so so confused
ok so i dont know if anyone read my old thread, but i have made things even worse for myself. the basic thing is that i went to uni with a boyfriend and then moved in next door to this other guy who i ended up enjoying spending time with better than my boyfriend. so basically i broke up with my boyfriend and now i am kind of with the guy who i live next to, but not properly.
within the first week of being with this other guy i missed my boyfriend a lot and thought that i had made a hugeee mistake, but then at other times i loved being with this other guy. whenever i am with one of them i always seem to wish that i am with the other. breaking up with my ex was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do, he means so much to me and we still see each other all the time. i feel like i am torn between the two and i know i have brought this all on myself but i just dont know how to get out of it. james (the other guy) is being so cool about it as well which makes it even harder. like he knows how difficult the situation with my ex is which is why we are keeping out relationship quiet, but surely that means its not right if i feel the need 2 keep it secret. like obviously the others in my house and his know, but i just couldnt bear to tell my ex...it would kill him. i know that i should tell him but i cant. i dont know what i want...and i dont know who to choose...how do i know for sure who i should be with? maybe the answer is neither...
Indeed you need to take some time out and not be with either of them. You're confused and should spend some time just being on your own, learning about yourself, and thinking about what you really want in life and relationships. College is a big time of personal change and growth. Don't miss out anything by spending so much time agonizing about these two guys. Go out and try new things and meet new people.
Well some people say that you shouldn't tempt fate, and for them I can not disagree. But I never learned nothing from playing it safe; I say fate should not tempt me. I take my chances.
i know that that is probably what i should do, but im just not sure i am going to be able to...like whenever i go home, i always give my ex a lift as i have a car at uni and we live near each other so it makes sence, and we always end up going out with all of my school friends and everything and so i always spend a lot of time with him, and i am sure i will all over xmas as well, and with james i practically live with him..so its just hard to get space from them and actually have time to clear my head
So tell us about the beginning of this relationship with James, you say you are "not really with him" he lives next door so you are "practically with him", you don't dis-like being with your ex, in fact you like being with him.
So what time do you spend with James, what happens when you spend time with him, what also do you both talk about, how affectionate is he with you?
CW
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
well basically he knows that i cant be with him properly because there are still feelings there for my ex, and i dont really think it would be fair on him for me 2 be in a new relationship this soon, and i dont think i would really be comfortable with it, but we have kissed a few times and we do spend a lot of time together and he has told me how much he likes me, and that he wants me to be his girlfriend and all of this...but i do still have really strong feelings for my ex...like it just feels unfinished...and its not totally finished...like i have broken up with him but we still see each other a lot...and again we have kissed a couple of times since we broke up, which i know is really bad as i am kind of with both of them, but like...officially i am single, though i think both of them kind of see me as their girlfriend...i know this is gona sound like i am just having fun and screwing both of them about, but i really care about both of them, and i know that what i am doing now is probably the most hurtful thing i can do to them both but i honestly dont know what else to do! i just wish that there was a way that i could get away from both of them just for a week or so and clear my head...i just feel trapped at the moment, and no matter which one i am with, i always have this massive sence of guilt in the back of my head. i was seriously considering dropping out of uni the other day just to get away from the situation, although i know that thats ridiculous and i would never really do it...but i was just thinking about how much easier it would make all of this...i just wish i could run away from it all, but then when i am with either one of them, i just love being with both of them (except the part of me that feels guilty) and i just dont know how i would cope with losing either one of them...though they have both told me that they dont think that they could be just friends with me...i feel as though my time is running out and soon i am going to get caught out and just end up with them both hating me...
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