New Relationship help

**wondergirl** · 12-27-2008 02:31 PM

I've been seeing a guy for the past 2 months. We only see eachother twice a week. He just bought a house and is completely renovating it, and that is where his mind is. We have fooled a round a few times and had sex only once 2 weeks ago. I spent the past 2 days with him and he only cuddled with me - i was massaging his back and everything and he made no attempt to make out or kiss me. I'm a little confused - I know he is into me as he always asks to hang out - I'm not used to making first moves - is this perhaps what he is waiting for - or being a gentleman, or is he really tired?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-27-2008 03:06 PM

I would say there is a good friendship there, but no full "connection" yet, maybe because his mind is on something else, maybe because he doesn't want "commitment".

I wouldn't be making any moves and I wouldn't be putting my heart out on a sleeve either, if you do the reverse, act only as a friend with him, then you hold the cards better, if you are hoping to turn it into a relationship.

It's easy for a female to bond and attach herself to a man, once she has been intimate with him.

A man does not react or feel this way, he has to "gain" feelings for a woman, sex is just sex most times in their mind.

Pends on what you "really" want to achieve, or if you feel because you were intimate you two should therefore automatically now be classed as an "item".

CW

**wondergirl** · 12-27-2008 03:14 PM

I'm not too concerned about eh committed relatinship part. Things have just been really fun and easygoing...building the friendship. I was just hust that he didn't make a move on me 2 nights in a row - but cuddles me in public and will spoon with me.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-27-2008 03:18 PM

Well maybe he respects you, sees himself the "building of friendship" and doesn't want to "use" you...

Maybe cause you've had sex with him, then you don't see the harm in it happening more frequently, but more to the point, feel "un-attractive" to him because he spooned you but didn't have sex, an in-security of the self, as you don't know why he did this.

As, i said, it could be respect, it could be that he does in fact see you as a friend and that "happened" that time, two weeks ago.

Go with the flow then if you dont' care about "relationship" sides, with this guy and take it all as it is, without worrying about it, doesn't mean your not attractive, or he's not attracted ,he wouldn't have done it in the first place if you weren't.

CW

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