Quote:
Originally Posted by aSafePlace2Stand
First off - hi, I'm a newbie here. Second - sorry about the cheater. Here's my 2 cents...
I had been married to a guy for 2 1/2 years and then I found out he was cheating on me. He was an amazing liar and a horrible husband. He treated me like a princess when we were dating and engaged. Once he got me tied down, he used me in every way imaginable.
Believe me when I say this, I can empathize with what you are going though now. You're a tornado of sadness and anger, and you just can't understand how he could betray you like this (especially if he hid it as well as my ex did). I agree with another poster about the trust. He's late - where is he? Who is he with this time? What do his clothes smell like? Is that perfume? You'll be looking for holes in every story he gives you. Now if you are a person who can handle that, or deal with an open marriage (as another poster does), then that is your choice. But I could not deal with that, and if you can't either, trust me, there is light at the end of the tunnel. You will find someone else. I did, and he is a fantastic man with morals and seemingly limitless affection and understanding.
Bottom line, if he is unwilling to be honest with you and dedicated to you, then you are wasting your time with him. Give your time to someone who deserves it.
"If another woman steals your man, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him."
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I adore this post.
It underlines every single aspect.
One of the realities, if you stay with him, you will
spend your life asking questions, where is he? Who is
he with? And making yourself into a stressed out clown.
Or, you simply stop caring.
Stop respecting him, stop caring,
he becomes a three legged dog.
There was a dog who had his front leg crushed and amputated.
He'd bobble around barking like a real dog, but he was just
there because the children loved him. He wasn't a watch dog,
He didn't realise he wasn't the watch dog any more.
(Yes, the other definition of three legged dog also applies)