Thread: Betrayed, alone, heartbroken and confused...

Hi Vics sorry you are having to go through this right now. Everyone has been through heartache at some point in their life and know that there really are no words that are going to make the pain go away, only time can do that. So the key is trying to pass the time to get yourself to the point it isn't so raw in your heart anymore.

It is so unfair the way some people choose to end relationships. He picked the most cowardly way possible.. and that is deciding to find someone else, wait until that thing was locked up --- THEN telling you its over, boom, just like that. Giving you no chance at trying work on the relationship , or to build up to its closure.

It's like he's known he was going to break up for a while now, sometimes when a persons unhappy they will start showing signs, pulling away, changing. You can see an end coming. Others hide those things and wait until they have something else to fall back on and just bounce from one heart to another.

That is really the worst. Many times, especially guys, are affraid to talk about being unhappy so instead they start acting like a jerk so that YOU will end the relationship and they don't have to. While that is a total douche move, to me even that is better than the just up and dissapearing one day move that your ex pulled.

He sounds insecure and troubled. He picked himself a teen mom? So not only did he find a girl a bit more on the naive side since she is younger, but also one that is in a position to need him a lot more than she would otherwise if she wasn't pregnant. Sounds like he's got some issues there and I think him leaving probably saved you from investing more of yourself into him.

You are young, and even when your older - relationships, being a part of someones life is an experience. At least that is how I like to view it. It is not always about the finish line or how long you ultimately end up together, but the joys and moments that made you smile along the way. No one wants to have to say goodbye to someone they love, and losing a boyfriend/husband is much like having them pass away, because they are just gone.

So there is a grieving process that you are experience and going to experience and that is just that. You WILL get to a point that you accept that he no longer wanted to be with you, and you will move on with your life... in the end finding happiness with yourself and someone who will suit you in ways you will be greatful this relationship ended so that you were open to finding the real deal.

But of course.. that matters not right now since right now since your head is still spinning from how quickly everything fell apart and likely analyzing everything you ever did trying to find out where YOU went wrong. Please don't do that. Sometimes peoples feeling just change and we have no control over anyones feelings but our own. If he was no longer into the relationship , there is nothing you could have done to make him stay and would just tear yourself apart trying.

Take this time to focus on your needs. Time needs to pass, and watching a clock laying around your house thinking of the good times with this guy is going to make time move at a collasal pace. Get up, get out there and go for a walk. Start an exercise program, working out releases endorphins and will help you to physically and emtionally feel better from the inside out. Read a book, play a new video game, take a new course on something you've always wanted to learn. Try to embrace the shove into a new direction that you've been given and see it as an opportunity rather than a failure.