Thread: I'm hurting and I don't think I can be rational.

Good to hear about being in counseling; I hope you're finding it helpful! I certainly don't mean that any issues in your relationship are entirely your fault - not in the least. But in response to an action he makes that deserves maybe a level 5 reaction (out of 10), you might respond with an 8, for example - which he in turn may try to avoid so then he covers it up and then just makes it worse... and things spiral more and more out of control. All that can certainly make things messy and complicated, as blame isn't always easy to place strictly on one party alone.

I met my new counselor today. She's in her 50's at least. I'm not sure if I like her. I'm going to give her a chance for a couple of months though. I decided to go weekly instead of bi weekly to start. I do however miss my old counselor a lot. In the last five years I've been through 8 counselors at least and the last one was the first I've ever connected with. He was amazing. I actually felt abandoned when he decided to move into another area of counseling. It's an outreach program for homeless teens. Noble, yes. Do I understand, of course. I just miss him.

Anyways...

Yes, I do agree that I may respond with an 8 when it deserves a 5. I guess sometimes I feel that if I react in this way and explain everything to death that maybe he'd understand. I'm dead wrong. I've learned so much about myself lately and how to deal with him. Our relationship is going very well at this point. I talked to him today and thanked him for dealing with his crazy girlfriend. He said it's mutual basically. I love him.