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| Relationships General Discussion about friends, co-workers, & everyone else in our lives. |
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#1 |
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VIP Member
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Okay so I'm having serious money issues right now. I haven't been able to find a job in months, the bills are starting to pile up and I just barely have enough to pay my cell phone bill next month. I have been selling on eBay for a while but the income isn't enough. In a couple of weeks I'm going to have to pay for summer classes (which I might be able to get an extension) and my student loan money has run out. I don't even know if I'll be able to pay for fall classes.
So it came up one day in the car, my bf and I were driving home and he said "you could always strip" and I said "yeah I thought about it except if I get a professional job at a hospital, what happens if someone says 'hey aren't you a stripper?' then I get fired, maybe they won't say that’s why but the company will find a reason then to fire me". Then he said "yeah that’s probably true, but really I just think you don't have the b_ _ _ s to do it". Which for some reason really made me mad, maybe its just the fact that he said I couldn't do something,( plus I have danced half naked on tables when I used to party years ago ) but then he continued with "then I could change your ring tone to 'I’m in love with a stripper' " which was funny, and I did ask him honestly if he would care and he said no, but I really don't believe him. He thinks some guys going to give me $100 to take my top off which I think is really unrealistic, especially now, people don’t have that kind of money to through away. The other thing is that I would have to drive an hour away to work, because if I stayed around where I live I have a lot of family and the chances of them seeing me strip are very high. I couldn't deal with that. So please any kind of advice would be great! I think I'm more worried about it hurting my relationship with my boyfriend then anything. |
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#2 |
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WH Junior Administrator
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Different states have different rules about stripping that you should really look into. Don't expect to be able to walk into a club and take off your clothes, then collect the singles as they pile up.
In my state, you have to have a license that goes on your "permanent record." I know there are different laws about how close you can be to clients and how naked you can get. There are also startup costs like buying your own costumes. It may be less viable than you think. Check with a classy club nearby to see what it would take to get hired. |
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#3 |
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Silver Contributor 100+ Posts
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: United States
Posts: 1,235
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Any dancer will tell you that the real money, the big bucks is made doing lap dances. Its just the way it is. When you are on stage guys will toss a few dollars but the bread and butter of the club is lap dances. Visit a strip club and try to catch a peek at a lap dance, not the flirtacious at the table dances, but the vip champagne room dances... see if you can visualize yourself doing that with an occasional cutie - but more than likely someone that repulses you...
Its not as glamorous as we see in movies. It involves a lot of babywipes dipped in alcohol to wipe off the icky stuff after some of those dances. The only ones that make money just taking off their clothes and dancing on a stage are features (usually adult film stars, miss nude world winners etc etc) that is because they are being paid to make an appearance and bring men into the club.
__________________
------------- Defintion of Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." - Albert Einstein |
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#4 |
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WH Moderator
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You have been given very good advise.
Seriously Little? Here you don't need a liscence, and there is no record. But, seriously, you WILL get caught out by family or friends, the neighbour who lerks that no one knew about, a bucks night, where a group of your mates, brothers turn up and recognise you, then there's the perception of what else you may do and the offers to deal with in that regard. Your boyfriend's mates finding out and suggesting what else your doing, your boyfriend wondering himself, etc, etc, etc. Absolutely, when money is tight you need to get out there and find a solution but I don't think that this is it. Waitressing, cleaning dishes in a restaurant, anything but I would be going for don't do it. CW
__________________
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul It doesn't happen over night if truth were to be told Like everything in life that's hard to achieve you must believe! Register! | Rules/FAQ | Contact Mod |
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#5 |
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March 2008 "Poster of the Month"
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: SF bay area
Posts: 1,333
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I don't think stripping is a problem IF (and its a very big IF) it doesn't bother you, and you wouldn't mind your friends finding out. If you are embarrassed to have people know, then I think it is a bad idea - someday someone will find out. Even if they don't you would live in fear of it happening.
The are a whole range of activities from stripping to prostitution - you would need to set absolute limits of what you are comfortable doing. I would also worry about a slippery slope - stripping, private dances for more money, lap dances for even more money, realizing that there isn't that much difference between a lap dance and prostitution, etc.... I have no problem with any of the various forms of selling sex for money - as long as the person selling doesn't feel coerced. I notice you are in the US. While the job market is mostly bad, there are some areas that have money. The government 'stimulus' package has dumped a lot of money on some government agencies, and some are hiring. Look for companies that do a lot of business with the government, or with government agencies. |
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#6 |
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VIP Member
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It seems like in the end more than likely something bad will come of it. Which is what I had been feeling but I needed to be told by others. If I ask friends they will want me to do it and support me but they don't think about what will happen in the long run. And really the number 1 reason why I never did it in the past is because I don't want to give lap dances, especially because I have a bf. So if that's where the money is then it's not worth it. And it really was tempting because around where I live there is no nudity unless you go into VIP. So its dancing on stage in a bikini, how hard could that be? So thank you everyone for posting, you have helped me make my decision to not do it.
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#7 |
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WH Junior Administrator
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I don't think women should feel ashamed of having been a stripper to get through a rough patch. My sister is the source of my information (living proof that people WILL find out, though our parents never did. She was a "cocktail waitress," by God.) She doesn't sound like she's at all repentant of having done it, as she made a lot of money and must never have crossed that invisible, imaginary line of wrongdoing.
There are more unpleasant things that go along with it, however. She was exposed to a lot of drugs and people who do/did them. Her coworkers were often thieves (got her costume shoes stolen in one city.) Plus the added stress of having to lie to people. Frankly, if it weren't for the license, I'd probably do it for money. I assume that if she could save up enough money for college while supporting a drug habit, then dances and lapdances must be pretty good cash. If it makes you uncomfortable, by all means, don't do it, but if you're really strapped it could be a salvation. Do you have any friends who strip? |
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#8 |
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VIP Member
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No I don't have any friends who/or have stripped. But you have made some really good points and I think I am comfortable with doing some things and others I am not. Like I think I would be okay with dancing on stage but not talking to the men and giving them lap dances. And I have also thought about the stealing, I have a very expensive phone that I don't want stolen and I couldn't go to work with out it. And I am also worried about the other girls, on one hand I have heard they are really friendly and then on the other I have heard they are very cut throat. But like I said before the thing that bothers me the most is having a bf, and even though he said he was okay with it I really don't believe him and think it will back fire on me in the end. He gets mad for the simplest thing, things people shouldn't even waste their time being mad about. I can just see him one day being mad at me just because he was THINKING about what I MIGHT have been doing the night before. I am afraid to risk it.
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#9 |
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VIP Member
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Oh and thanks for the advice about looking into a job with the government. I hadn't thought of that. And I got my check today! So that should hold me off for a little. Its just so stressful not having a steady income and bills to pay.
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#10 |
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Gold Contributor 500+ Posts
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Personally I don't think it should be a problem, when you come down to it we all sell ourselves in the job market. However, we live in a society with many vestiges of puritanism and the disapproval could come back to haunt you. This is a big part of why many women use stage names when they do this.
I understand from some freinds including the light of my life who once work security for some clubs, that there tends to be a lot drug and alcohol abuse among the ladies and many have some real life style problems. Have you considered something like waitressing at a higher end place? |
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