nattypatty

So I met this amazing guy about a month ago, we both really like each other and have told each other so etc. However, I have brought up the idea of dating a few times, and he never disagrees, in fact he likes it. However he said between him and I we're dating (he explained why but I can't recall) but to others we just come off as friends who really like each other, not yet dating.


Another issue is that ever since he has come home from a week long trip he doesn't return all my phone calls, or calls me when he says he will.

He says and has said many times how he doesn't want me hooking up with other boys.

Should I talk to him about this? I hate having to deal with guys that won't date me but will sleep with me.

dr.mansview

[quote=nattypatty;111055]So I met this amazing guy about a month ago, we both really like each other and have told each other so etc. However, I have brought up the idea of dating a few times, and he never disagrees, in fact he likes it. However he said between him and I we're dating (he explained why but I can't recall) but to others we just come off as friends who really like each other, not yet dating.


Another issue is that ever since he has come home from a week long trip he doesn't return all my phone calls, or calls me when he says he will.

He says and has said many times how he doesn't want me hooking up with other boys.

Should I talk to him about this? I hate having to deal with guys that won't date me but will sleep with me.[/quote]

unfortunately u have no one to blame but yourself..you're giving them what they want..try getting to know them for a couple of months..if they like u they will stick around

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nattypatty

K :\ thanks.

tritonalum07

"However he said between him and I we're dating (he explained why but I can't recall) but to others we just come off as friends who really like each other, not yet dating."

Huge, huge, HUGE red flag. If a guy doesn't want other people to know you're dating, he either has someone on the side or has some other reason to keep you a secret. A person who is happy in their relationship isn't afraid for people to know. Find someone worth your time and self-respect honey.

nattypatty

He said we don't know each other enough to be titled as dating, which makes sense and he does call me his girl to his friends.

CHANDLERS WISH

I know you kind of put off what was said, yeah okay, thanks... And?

But, the thing is you want us to tell you how to get him to be your boyfriend and you believe him and that he is telling you the truth, especially because he says? my girl...

And, especially, because he says " don't sleep with anyone else".

What effectively he is saying is your mine, don't go let someone else enter you, eweee... I won't go there again.

But, he's also saying, that's all you are... I'm not interested because you gave in too early and you would to others and beside the point, there was no chase with us, and it was easy.. I'm not interested.

Your best course of action is to retract.

Tell him you met a guy and you've been conversing with him, have no intentions of sleeping with him but he's hot, cute, good to you, nice....

Play him back at his own game, whilst making him realise your actually not into him that much, your not stupid, you didn't give it up for him, rather you liked him...

Without saying it.

He's using his "control" over you...

Never let a guy win sweet, in that regard even if they won initually, it can be changed and if not, he's not worth it...

Do you honestly think you are the only one? Please don't take that the wrong way but seriously?

He's been away, refused to be your man... He's not ready. So, therefore, he's playing and I am hoping he has used a condom on you in that period of time too.

We are women okay.. If we can't get our emotions in check and stuff up, we can't afford to get our parts not in check and get something we can never, ever, get rid off, therefore, cause problems in finding someone else later..

Get my drift?

CW

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Bert

Hey..
Always good to be open with your partner. If both of your views matches then continue your relation..If not say bye..

Miya

As CW mentioned to some extent I think he's trying to exercise control over you. It's YOUR choice who you see/date/sleep with and will never be his just as it's his choice who he does things with. Apparently you are not in a committed relationship with this guy because he won't really even say it.

IMO he needs to either acknowledge a monogamous relationship with you as his equal or it's time for you to find someone else. Don't let it become some fwb situation unless that's what you want. The other thing is hold out. Either a man will love you for who you are and not for your sex or that's all he wants and that's not good for you really.

You said he doesn't return all your calls or call when he says he will and to me that's a sign that there something/someone else in his radar. He doesn't want you hooking up with others because then you will no longer be his "property." All these things would raise red flags and alert alarms in my head.

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