My best friend is divorcing after 32 years of marriage

**stressed** · 10-02-2009, 12:57 AM

I just got the news via email and I'm in shock. We don't live in the same country so I can't meet her and she's going back to her home country today or tomorrow so I can't call either. She won't have Internet there either but she said we can post letters to each other.

Anyway, she says her husband has been violent and abusive, verbally, physically and psychologically and I can totally understand her as I've been there before. Her son is getting married next year. I know her husband and she's told me how difficult it has been for her over the years, but I didn't know she was still being abused or that it has been so bad.

I don't know what to say really, just felt like posting here as it's always so sad to hear such news. She's like a friend and a second mother to me and I've known her for the past 4 years. I know she's doing the right thing, but I can't help feeling sorry for her :-( She's such a great woman and deserves better.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 10-02-2009, 01:42 AM

Be happy for her, is what I think... She's been going through this for years and finally had the courage to walk from it..

She will need your support but she has come to realisation that she does in-deed deserve better, or she wouldn't have made the move finally.

It's sad that we "waste" time in trying to work marriages when they are in this state but encourage her of her new life that will un-fold and that she will never wake and wonder what's in store for her today, now she will wake and smell the roses and see the beauty around her as she is free.

That's a feeling I will never forget, after the shaking and a few tears shed walking out and into my new home...

But, I have never been happier...

CW

**happy ending** · 10-02-2009, 08:21 AM

i agree with CW, it is a long journey back from an abusive marriage, but leaving is the most important step, i hope she does write to you, as sometimes writing things done is so good for dealing with pain. where is she going, why dont they have the internet - that sux!

**WildChild** · 10-02-2009, 08:25 AM

Well you may miss her and feel badly that she went through that but just think - she is getting something better - she's getting out of an ugly situation! Stay in touch with her and give her lots of positive encouragement.

10-02-2009, 12:57 AM	#1
stressed Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Europe Posts: 147	My best friend is divorcing after 32 years of marriage I just got the news via email and I'm in shock. We don't live in the same country so I can't meet her and she's going back to her home country today or tomorrow so I can't call either. She won't have Internet there either but she said we can post letters to each other. Anyway, she says her husband has been violent and abusive, verbally, physically and psychologically and I can totally understand her as I've been there before. Her son is getting married next year. I know her husband and she's told me how difficult it has been for her over the years, but I didn't know she was still being abused or that it has been so bad. I don't know what to say really, just felt like posting here as it's always so sad to hear such news. She's like a friend and a second mother to me and I've known her for the past 4 years. I know she's doing the right thing, but I can't help feeling sorry for her :-( She's such a great woman and deserves better.

10-02-2009, 01:42 AM	#2
CHANDLERS WISH WH Moderator Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Australia Posts: 9,963 Blog Entries: 7	Be happy for her, is what I think... She's been going through this for years and finally had the courage to walk from it.. She will need your support but she has come to realisation that she does in-deed deserve better, or she wouldn't have made the move finally. It's sad that we "waste" time in trying to work marriages when they are in this state but encourage her of her new life that will un-fold and that she will never wake and wonder what's in store for her today, now she will wake and smell the roses and see the beauty around her as she is free. That's a feeling I will never forget, after the shaking and a few tears shed walking out and into my new home... But, I have never been happier... CW __________________ Do we not realise that in order to find a soul It doesn't happen over night if truth were to be told Like everything in life that's hard to achieve you must believe! Register! \| Rules/FAQ \| Contact Mod

10-02-2009, 08:21 AM	#3
happy ending Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: western australia Posts: 655	i agree with CW, it is a long journey back from an abusive marriage, but leaving is the most important step, i hope she does write to you, as sometimes writing things done is so good for dealing with pain. where is she going, why dont they have the internet - that sux! Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 10-02-2009 at 08:26 AM. Reason: correction for member

10-02-2009, 08:25 AM	#4
WildChild Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Western USA Posts: 6,233 Blog Entries: 5	Well you may miss her and feel badly that she went through that but just think - she is getting something better - she's getting out of an ugly situation! Stay in touch with her and give her lots of positive encouragement. __________________ We can only learn to love by loving. Iris Mudoch, British writer

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