Thack, it is more difficult with all of the water under the bridge (well heck, the bridge washed away!) I am hoping it will be worth it. But for now, I refuse to hope, or I am trying not to. And I already told him, I am not going to try until he proves he is making the effort for real, then, maybe, we can start at 0 and work our way up. He already knew I had trust issues with men when he met me, so now he is starting to realize a little of what he put me thru and where I am at with that. Time will tell.
Update!!!!
I gave him the chance to try, now I have broken ribs, numerous bruises on my neck and legs, and a PFA. I guess ya'll can tell he fell off the proverbial wagon, in a big, violent way. Thank ya'll for being here, I read your answer to all the other posts and it helped me to take everything slow (even though ya'll were talking to other people) So now the pain and bruises will fade and I will continue on the way I have been, one step at a time, alone for a while and happy about that. Thanks again.
Oh dear! Please tell me that you are going to leave him for good?
Thank you for replying, SP. Actually, he is gone. I have a few loose ends to tie up with his family, but he will never be close enough to hurt me again. I am having the locks changed again, the neighbors are keeping an eye on me and so are the police. I also won't leave the house with out pepper spray in my hand again. It makes me mad at myself that I believed that he was making progress and that there might be hope for us someday. I will NEVER make that mistake again.
Give yourself time to heal. Be gentle and loving with yourself, buy yourself flowers. Get a new haircut? Exersize, eat well, you are starting over, free of him.
There are good men in the world, but you have to spend some time in self examination to understand why you let this man in your life. But don't go overboard on that and get lost in it. They can be good at hiding what they are. When you are ready find a man you can laugh, build and have fun with. And wait at least two years into the relationship before you even think of living with a man.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
good adviceOriginally Posted by WildChild
Wish I'd followed it in the past!
Learn from someones else's mistakes folks - they are very unlikely to to able to hide what they are for two full years!
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
good luck 2 u both...
x~There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy......Her heart!~x
x~the wench~x
WC & SP, very good advice, thank you. My daughter and I talked about alot last night (I didn't let her know what happened, just told her that it wasn't going to work out with him). We are planning a "spa day" next weekend. And I don't do flowers, lol, but we are going out to get a live Christmas tree that we can plant after Christmas.
Thank you, TW.
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