Are you uncomfortable around other women?

**SecretlySad** · 01-31-2010 03:04 PM

My whole life I have felt uncomfortable around other women. I grew up in a street full of boys and have always felt more at ease in the company of males. Whenever I meet a female I feel very nervous and almost like I have to be someone else. I don't have many close female friends - or female friends in general! - at all.

Does anyone else ever get this feeling?

**caterpillar79** · 01-31-2010 03:12 PM

I used to be that way when I was in high school. I eventually developed friendships amongst female classmates, but most of them are buried in books like me.

Still we didn't go out to socialize or anything as often as others did. Being the only daughter, I played with mostly my youngest brother. My cousins (my age) are all boys, we went to school together from elementary to high school. I am definitely a tomboy.

I played boy games, climbed trees, fought with them and beat them, and got beaten. This confused me growing up. I even had a female crush (high school), only to end up being pursued by my crush's brother - then I realized I am a girl. LOL.

I don't feel awkward the way you do now. But, I can relate better with male friends than with females. I found out that most of the things I'd want to do, my girl friends are not interestes (i.e. billiards, outdoor stuff) but my male friends would think it's exciting.

Generally, I feel more at ease with males than females (given the "atmosphere" is safe).

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 01-31-2010 03:34 PM

I do think alot has to do with age.

I found in my youth a lot of jealousy from other girls, yet boys none. I think that is why I was very much a tomboy, having said that, I loved dresses and still do and dress as a woman very much so right down to the painted toe nails

I also found alot of them didn't have morals, seek and find no matter who's man he is, which is a shame.

You need to look at the character and if they have the same beliefs, morals, you'll develop good female friendships.

CW

**Airmans Sweetie** · 01-31-2010 04:15 PM

i myself understand, i grew up a farm girl. riding, barrelracing, team penning, rodeos. & wen i moved away i got into cars more & more, so my life has been being rough, tough, & getting dirty (insert joke here). i have always had way more male friends than females. the few female friends i have r women who r like me, big tomboys. i'm like u, i don't know what to do wen physically around a women. i become nervous, i don't know wat to talk to them about. most of my convos r about cattle, aircraft, cars, car parts, penis, & many other disturbing male things haha. idk i'm like u, idk wat to do, much less i feel like i have to go else where wen a woman tries to talk to me about girl things

**SecretlySad** · 01-31-2010 06:52 PM

It's funny if I talk about girl things, even though I am very feminine and love fashion etc I feel like a bimbo. "Ohmygod I love your hair" kinda stuff just doesn't sound right when I say it!!!

**Airmans Sweetie** · 01-31-2010 07:59 PM

haha yeah, it feels odd, unnatural...

**Mes T** · 01-31-2010 08:08 PM

Haha.

In my opinion, y'all just need to chillax.

It's not about whether someone has a penis or a vagina (that's what it boils down to, isn't it?). Men and women have a variety of different interests, and as we've seen in this thread alone, women are capable of liking things that are traditionally "male," just like many men out there like flowers, dolls, and painted nails.

There's no reason to feel awkward around someone just because they're a man or a woman. Take the effort to find out more about the people you meet, and you might be surprised!

**WildChild** · 01-31-2010 08:23 PM

It depends on the women. Had more trouble with this when I was younger. I love to sew and get creative with clothing but I'm not really into clothes, persay. I like to keep my hands, feet and nails well groomed - but not spend a lot of time thinking or talking about it. I can get woken from a sleep, be up dressed, dash on a bit of make up, have a bowl of cereal and be out the door in 20 mins (the cereal takes the most time). I am rarely interested in spending a lot of time shopping, I spent more time buying a generator this month, than on the pair of boots I got today, Sorel's, waterproof, insulated, reinforced toe - work boots - had to get men's, apparently women aren't supposed to wear work boots.

So there is a type of women, I simply don't have much in common with, at least not on the surface. It's better now than it was 30 years ago. I find more women are less into the fluffy stuff and I'm better at finding something we can chat about if they are fluffy. I don't always pull this off. One day I was in the grocery line and the woman behind me, made some comment about Brad and Angie, having problems. I said, "I'm sorry, are they good friends of yours?" It wasn't until later I realised she was taking about some actors. She had looked at me kind of funny.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy being a woman. I love to dress up, have a good long chat with my girlfreinds - just won't be about celebrities or hair and fingernails. I do find that I have to be more careful what I say around many women, sex may be a taboo subject (have to watch that around men too- but for different reasons) . But overall I'm very comfortable around other women.

**SecretlySad** · 01-31-2010 08:24 PM

Yes Mes I do that now! Just ask questions and find out more about the person they are.

**Mes T** · 01-31-2010 08:32 PM

I will say this, a certain type of person has always made me feel uncomfortable, and that's the sorority/frat type of people, like the kind you see on "Gossip Girl"... not that I've ever sat through a single episode...

But yeah. "Those" people.