LA+79

I met my common law spouse when I was 19 years old while he was visiting our hometown, he was 23 years old at the time. We instantly fell in love, it was the best 2 weeks I have ever had. He returned home to the West Coast and we talked on the phone every day for 6 weeks until I moved to be with him. We started out our lives with nothing but we didn't care we had eachother. A few years later we moved back to Ontario so I could attend University, lived there for 6 years and then moved to a bigger city 3 years ago, mostly so he could progress in his career as a Chef.

We worked really hard to get to where we were in life, had great families and friends. We were together 10.5 years. We bought our first house and he started a new job closer to home. Things were finally getting into place. 8 months after we moved in I caught him cheating on me with a 22yr old girl he worked with, he was 34 at the time. I have tried to be objective, however I can honestly say that there were no signs, I never saw this coming. Up until the day he left, he was talking about doing home renovations, etc...

I found a text message on his phone from this girl that said "I want some of your sweet wake up lovin" I confronted him and he denied it, stating that she was just joking and they were only friends, nothing more. I kicked him out that day and he never returned. Instead he moved in with her and her roommates across town, however lied and told me that he was staying with a guy from work. Never called, never visited, our only form of communication was via emails.

In turn, we have lost it all, our 10.5 yr partnership, our home, our car, you name it, it's gone. He completely left me to pay for all of our financial obligations by myself while he was giving his new young girlfriend "sweet wake up lovin." Needless to say, I tried all avenues to get myself out of this mess with no success and had to file bankruptcy and the house foreclosed. I was devastated, still am really and it's been 8 months. I guess I'm having a hard time accepting that he was willing to ruin our lives, especially mine to continue with his deceitful relationship. I hate to sound like I am playing the victim but I do feel like I am, I literally lost everything I have ever known over the last decade. Is anyone worth this?!! It's not just heartbreak.

He has since moved in with her alone and they apparently rent a house together. He never told me this, I found out through mutual friends and once I confronted him, he told me the only reason why he moved in there because the rent was cheap. We do not have any contact, haven't seen him since the day he came to get his belongings and that was 6 months ago, he showed up in her car and when I asked him for a hug goodbye, he said no and yelled "see ya" from across the street. That was it, that's how my 10.5 year relationship with my spouse and best friend ended, just like that!! He has responded to my emails stating that he is regretful, that I deserve so much more and that I will see that it was for the best. He has also stated that he is paying for it through constant bad luck, poor health and haunting memories. However, those are just words to make himself feel better. If he is so regretful, why is he staying in that relationship?!

Today, I saw a picture of them on facebook, a picture that was taken only 1 month after he was kicked out, he brought her home to meet his family!!! I was at home devastated and here he is smiling away in this photograph with the person who is responsible for my demise?!!! Unbelievable!!! I have never been this hurt. I understand that it's not just her, I blame mostly him but it truly says alot about her character and morals!!!

It will be 8 months soon since this nightmare started and I am doing better however, I'm still holding on, I still miss him and would love more than for him to want me back. I could never go back but I would like for him to realize that what we had was special and he really did leave the best thing that has ever happened to him. I wish he would see that, it ended so suddenly, not even a conversation about anything! I still can't believe that he is gone, that he could ruin our lives to be with a 22 year girl and never even give me a chance, us a chance.