Yeah, there is a lot more going on than what is being said. He is actually the first guy I have been able to say no to. And yes the lack of lube is a mental thing. My last boyfriend never waited for me to get wet so I become nervous before sex quite often and I have to be really worked up for me to actually be wet. It is pretty frustrating actually, at first he thought I wasn't attracted to him. It took 3 months for him to bring me to my "first flood" as we call it. It was because he told me that if I wanted it then I would have to make it happen. That was the first time it clicked that no matter what I got to choose. But sometimes I fall into what he calls "whipped puppy" mode. I just become submissive and forget I have a say in what happens. When I get like that he won't touch me in a sexual manner at all because he knows I won't say no if I don't like it.
I came on here just wanting to rant, I didn't want to tell my friends what happened because they all get frustrated when I become a whipped puppy. And I also promised my boyfriend that I would tell him when I didn't want it, and I wasn't able to tell him that time.
If things get bad I will break it off. But one thing that I have noticed is when I mention something bothers me then for the most part he tries to change whatever it is. Or at least consider what I am saying, which is a lot more than most guys I have seen.