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Thread: in love...help!

  1. #1
    VIP Member Array justlikeheaven's Avatar
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    Exclamation in love...help!

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    I have been unofficially seeing someone for 8 months now. I fall for people pretty quickly, and I'm starting to think I'm falling in love with him (F). Since January, we have spent pretty much every single day together. And when we're not together, we're texting. As would anyone else, I started developing really deep feelings for him. He also developed feelings and often tells me I make him so happy & that he's never felt so appreciated by a girl before. I give him the world. Right now I'm unemployed, but if i had to, i would give him my last $5. I would buy him a pack of cigarettes with the last of my money rather than buy one for myself. He makes me feel amazing. I'm not the skinniest girl, but he still calls me beautiful and wants to be with me. He likes me for me, and i never had that sense of security before. (My last relationship failed due to my ex saying he wasn't 100% happy with my body.) But F makes me feel things i have never felt before. At this point in time, i have never been so happy with anyone.

    We've talked about having an official relationship plenty of times, and the most recent time, he told me "in time" which i can deal with.

    I feel empty when i don't know where he is or what he's doing. i NEED him, and it kinda scares me.

    So what i need help with..
    What do i do? Do i tell him what i'm feeling? I've had a hard time expressing my feelings in my last relationship, but maybe that was because it wasn't real love? I'm just scared of him rejecting it. What if i tell him i'm in love with him & it turns out he doesn't feel the same? That'll just ruin the entire relationship and i don't want that and i don't think he wants that either. So can someone please help me, tell me what i should do because i'm lost!

  2. #2
    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    I would definitely not tell him you're in love with him if he's not willing to be an 'official couple'.
    Why won't he be official and why do you need to be official? Just curious.
    Can you just be ok with being happy together and not putting a label on it?
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  3. #3
    VIP Member Array justlikeheaven's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sourpuss View Post
    Why won't he be official and why do you need to be official? Just curious.
    Can you just be ok with being happy together and not putting a label on it?
    Honestly, I have no idea.
    And I am happy with how it is now, but I feel like I'd be even more happier, and safer if you will, if it was official.
    I want to be able to say "yes, that's my boyfriend", I want to tell people I'm in love and I don't want to have to keep it a secret.

  4. #4
    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    Is it a secret that you hang out everyday?
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  5. #5
    VIP Member Array justlikeheaven's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sourpuss View Post
    Is it a secret that you hang out everyday?
    Nope, everyone is completely aware of our "relationship"

  6. #6
    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    Maybe give it a little time...and distance. Maybe he needs to miss you a little bit to know how important the commitment part is. Start spending some days by yourself or with your friends, don't always be at his beck and call and see what happens.
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  7. #7
    VIP Member Array justlikeheaven's Avatar
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    Well that's kind of hard, considering we're in the same group of friends. Everyone is usually always together so I don't really have anywhere else to go. We've talked about spending some days apart, but we can't make it lol

  8. #8
    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    Schedule an afternoon or two a week to spend alone then. Read a book at the coffee shop, go for a hike or a long walk, go see a movie by yourself. There are tons of things you can do alone.
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  9. #9
    VIP Member Array justlikeheaven's Avatar
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    Well i do spend most of the day alone or with my best friend. And then towards the evening we eventually meet up with him. So it's not like we spend all day, every day together

  10. #10
    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    But you do spend his free time with him, correct? I think he just needs to miss you a bit to get the picture.
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