sad with my current boyfriend and not sure why

**sarahlee20** · 08-15-2010 10:40 PM

I am not sure what to do. Lately I've been very aggrivated with my boyfriend. I am not sure what it is. It doesn't help that the job market is what it is.He works with his dad on the weekends at the flee market. THats good but he doesn't make that much. It's hard because after i met him and we started dating things changed. His job let him go his truck broke down and then he didnt have a cell phone.It just hard because every relationship I have ever had I have had to take charge as in making decisions and finacally sporting hiim.I Mean he does do what he can when borrows money he always pays it back. That's never been a doubt in my mindWe've disscussed him getting up and activly looking for a job ,but he never has the money for gas etc. To make matters worse eventhough he's with me most of the time and spends the night.We've only been dating a couple months. Almost 3 months now.In my opinion I think we moved really quickly and spend too much time together sometimes. It's hard that we don't have any money. I'm hoping he'll get food stamps. When he gets them he's going to get them to fill my fridge.He always tries to please me. Just lately I feel irrtated.He's always been very sweet and loves me and is good with kids and my family. We were fighting tonight and i was just crying and he says if i don't want to be with him and if i am not happy to not be with him. I do want to be with him but sometimes i don't think he's good enough for me. Although I want him to be because I love him. WHat should i do? Stick with it or let him go?

**WildChild** · 08-15-2010 11:56 PM

Only you can decide but you moved into this relationship awfully quickly after the last one ended. You may need some time to just be on your own for several months.

**jns** · 08-16-2010 12:27 AM

So, he has hit a rough patch. Do you believe that when he is through it, he will be someone you want a relationship with? What was his job? Why did you start going out with him in the first place? Have those circumstances changed? Many times people don't look for jobs hard in a tough market because they get to hate the rejection. If he was to get a job at McDonald's, would it be OK? Why do you feel he may not be good enough for you?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-16-2010 12:50 AM

I think if you remember back, when you decided to date within 1 week of leaving your past partner, which was fine, but you gave a bit of an indepth over what he did for a living, etc and the other one you dated, not so good in that department, we suggested you take time out for you and not get into a relationship yet.

That was what 3 months ago?

I think you love the idea of being in love and can't be on your own, but also your putting people into boxes, the men must have this, they must have that...

That's understandable in away, as I think your last boyfriend didn't contribute much and so your feeling the same thing again instead of viewing this guy as "different" just perhaps in a rut at the moment...

I understand you want security but your talking boyfriend not husband. And he needs to spend some time somewhere else as well, so you both can grow whilst having some independence, you can't be living in each others pockets from get go, it's smothering..

CW

**Fatin** · 08-16-2010 01:58 AM

I say stick with him .. he might be not having alot but he loves you

and be patient you might end up in a palace

..

**prawnprincess** · 08-16-2010 02:19 AM

I don't think a new relationship can properly grow when one person is supporting the other. Also, I don't think a guy can get much motivation to get his act together when he is being taken care of/mothered by someone. It seems like this situation is not good for either of you. Maybe that is why you're unhappy. I found that when I was supporting my boyfriend I always thought things were going to get better but they never did. It is a very troubling feeling. Maybe you feel guilty about letting him go because he is going through tough times. I could understand that feeling. But you cannot put yourself in the position of being run over like this- if you are not happy, then really he will not be happy. These are just my thoughts since I don't know all the details. I bet you can feel what's best in your mind. It is really hard to make changes, but I've found that changes are usually for the better.