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Thread: To discuss or not

  1. #1
    Junior Member Array dadsgurl's Avatar
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    Default To discuss or not

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    Boyfriend and I are in LDR of 2 hours apart for 5 years. I am getting to a point of wanting to know where this is going. We have discussed marriage before and I feel like I should talk to him but not sure if this would be a good idea. Job market here in my city is not as good as where he is but I have been at my job 10 years and would lose alot to move. I also have colitis and see a doctor a couple times a year to keep it under control. I dont know what to do. I understand we both have to give up something to be together and I would love for him to move here. Any thoughts on bringing this up or should I just not push? I love him and I was in a bad marriage before so I am a little scared but I know this man has been there for me when I had two losses in my family. The road has been a little rocky after that but we have managed to get thru it together. I just am torn. Any opinions on this or anyone dealt with this?

  2. #2
    WH Moderator & WINNER OF BEST THREAD MARCH & JUNE 2011- Don't mes with Mes T Array Mes T's Avatar
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    Definitely talk to him! Who knows how many more years you'd otherwise have to spend, not knowing. You've been together a long time, it's perfectly reasonable to have this conversation.

  3. #3
    WH Super Moderator Array caterpillar79's Avatar
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    Being together that long would warrant this conversation. Be calm when you do bring it up, let's hope you're both in the same page.

    If he wants time to decide, let him. Tell him that he can have all the time he needs but he can't have you all to himself, because you're not going to put your life on hold for him. (This is me being a planner for what 'ifs')...

    I hope it doesn't get to that though... I wish you the best, dear.
    What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility. - Leo Tolstoy

    The clearest explanation for failure of any marriage is that two people are incompatible; that is, one is male and the other female. - Anna Quindlen

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