am i in the wrong here

**angel wings** · 12-09-2010 09:56 PM

i have been with my boyfriend for a year and half, and now all of a sudden it is an issue with him because im not yet divorced from my husband......we have only just through the settlement and the divorce is the next thing on the agenda but i just don't get why my boyfriend all of a sudden thinks its ok to treat me the way he is because the divorce hasnt happened as yet...am i the one that is maybe being unreasonable...

**WildChild** · 12-09-2010 10:03 PM

How is he treating you? I assume not very nicely?
If he knew what your situation was then, no, it is not right to use that against you.
Is there some reason he thinks you are dragging it out or something?

**angel wings** · 12-09-2010 10:12 PM

well it just all really started last night, hes just ignoring my texts and has got it into his head that i want to stay married, which isnt the case at all.....i have been seperated for just over 2 years and the settlement has just all been finalised and the next thing was the divorce...but when im getting treated like this with him ignoring my texts and acting the way he is it makes me not want to do anything about it because he is acting like a spoilt brat who thinks hes not getting his own way....it has never been an issue before and now all of a sudden it is....oh he did say to me weeks ago which is the only other time he has bought it up, that im not trully his if im still married...which is a load of

**WildChild** · 12-09-2010 10:15 PM

First of all you both need to remember that you are truly your own.
You're talking about behavior in the past 24 hours?
I wouldn't worry too much about it. Give him a break and see what happens?

**angel wings** · 12-09-2010 10:23 PM

Yeah well he doesnt see it that way, he gets very sulky when he doesnt get his own way with things and in his opinion he is always right....im just venting as im so angry that he thinks its ok to treat me this way when i never do it to him.....and i have never once ignored him....he can actually be controlling at times and we clash because i dont really allow that to happen when i dont agree...

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-09-2010 11:45 PM

What's the point in having a mind, if you can't be yourself?

1. He wants to propose to you at Christmas time, or New Years Eve.
2. He's immature and his mates have said something.

In any event, I have just gotten engaged and I'm not Divorced either, nor is he, him separated 20 months, although (12 since leaving the home) me 3 and a half years.

So I suggest that if he's controlling, opinionated, sulky, immature, ignorant, rude, and you clash, then obviously you'd end up Divorced a second time....

Never settle mam.

CW

**sahbunky** · 12-10-2010 06:41 AM

He's not yet your husband and nothing binding yet, legally btw you and him. So be careful with someone spirited before you get hooked unless if you are planning a second divorce. Get settled first before you go into a second relationship. More over you should divorce completely if are no more interested in your ex.

**angel wings** · 12-14-2010 03:54 AM

What's the point in having a mind, if you can't be yourself?

Lol so true chandlers wish.......that made me smile..........and i would so hope i wouldnt have to go through a divorce a second time, i have to get through the first one yet....and btw congratualtions on your engagement, i wish u all the best..............and sahbunky yes he is very spirited and i have to say thats one of the things i love about him, i just dont like his attitude when it comes to things like this when i dont think he really understands that it doesnt mean i love him any less because im not yet divorced, we only just got through the settlement............i have been committed to him for a year and a half, that has to say something......