The dreaded Long Distance Relationship. (How on earth do I survive it?)

**Lilithia** · 12-20-2010 06:45 AM

So my boyfriend of six months and I are going to different colleges.
The main problem is that I'm going to Scotland while he remains in Malaysia. Which means it's a really long LDR. The time difference is 8 hours, which means phone calls and skype and all is going to be very hard to juggle in between the sleeping hours and study hours of both of us. Flights to visit each other are obviously going to be costly and very infrequent. Read: Almost never.
Basically it looks like a train wreck waiting to happen.
The light at the end of the tunnel is that after 18 months, he too will be transferring to Scotland to study. So all we have to do is survive that long, barren 18 months.

I love him very much and so does he. We want to make this work the best we can.
How do I avoid the near-inevitable disaster?

**jns** · 12-20-2010 08:44 AM

The best time for you calling will be in the morning until early afternoon and for him in the afternoon and evening. Another time could be around 10 pm for you and 6 am for him. If skype works, it will be great.

Call once a day, if possible just to touch base. Tell each other you love them. Joking with the other and humor are necessary from both parties, IMHO. Tell each other what you love about them. Don't let the conversation deteriorate into a listing of what you did and what you are going to do, but let the other know about important things you are doing. Let the other in on when you go out with friends, even calling from such outings and having your friends say hi from time-to-time.

**blackgold2325** · 12-31-2010 01:10 AM

i need help, my man and i was together for 4years, but trough out the the last 2 years of our relationship i began to feel unhappy about a female friend of his that he talked too and was cold and distant to me , everytime we had a issue . well he been stress mostly with money reason. he came to see me last time since we leave in different state and couldn't just enjoy spending time with him with out thinking about the girl. to make things worse they leaved the same house and supposely he said the girl had feeling for him. trought the last 2 years i did stress that i didn't want that women leaving with him , but he seem not to do anything . a few days ago i told him i couldn't deal with the situation anymore if its stayed the same , than they was going to be no more us. he said nothing to me except im sorry for everything i put u through and sorry for being so selfish, but the weird thing he acted really nice he cooked meanwhile he was getting ready to return to his state. after we had the break up talk he stayed at my place for 2 more days but the whole time he didn talk to me . but he cooked took the trash out, left his stuff at my place and didn give me my keys back. than we he go to his city he texted me saying "im home , thanks"

please someone explain to me this crazy picture , i don't get it . its my first real relatioship and had trouble making sense of alot of things that was happening. i still love him, but im also not going to accept or be a in less than good relationship where a guy never talk when it came to problem that needed to be addressed. one part of me says forget him for good he doesn't care about you, another says he will come around he still love you but i don't know that. please let me know what u think im going crazy and feel so lonely since i spoke to him every night the whole 4 years. im confuse and don't know what to do.

**CheatConfession** · 01-03-2011 08:44 PM

I am from NY but, I have a lot of family in Greece. The last 2 times I was there I have been in a relationship. There is a 7 hour time difference so I always called and skyped my girlfriend when i was going to bed around 1 am. This is wen she was getting out of work or ready t go out. I ws only there for a month long vacation, but we could have made it work for longer if we had to.

**Butterflylily** · 01-03-2011 11:42 PM

You gotta be positive ^____^ always, take it from me. I guess you could say im a survivor lol, yep, 3 years in a long distance relationship, for 3 years no sense of touch or hearing, smelling nothing.

I would write you a bible of tips, but the bottom line what matters is staying positive both you and your lover.
And its possible, if theres one little thing called "Love" then its possible, trust me. Hang in there.