It's Over

**Brokenwings** · 01-31-2011 02:31 AM

Hello All,

As you may be aware from previous posts i have been having a lot of trouble with my now so called EX. he was the most difficultest man when it came to arguments, even so everything had to be on his terms and he would just not speak to me for days. It just go to the point now i couldnt take it anymore and i told him its over. The thing is im perfectly fine about it as he's put me through even though he has also been a very loyal honest bf.

Im not sad about it thats the thing, im actually fine and i dont think thats normal lol, maybe because it hasnt sunk in or i know he will come crawling back, not sure but the only emotion that im going through at the moment is relief lol

**stressed** · 01-31-2011 02:01 PM

It's the first feeling you get once you end a problematic relationship. Relief.
BUT:
Be careful about him "crawling back", because he will. You have to end all contact with him for 2-3 weeks. No emails, no calls, no texts. Even switch cell phone number.

The most common stages a man (in love) goes through when he's left behind are: Shock - Anger - Pain (you should be careful here not to feel sorry for him) - Losing his mind (just ignore this stage) - Acceptance - Asking you back in a friendly way.

Whatever he tells you, whatever he promises you, don't believe him. I think you did the right thing, because I remember your posts.

Go out and have fun!

**Beautiful Disaster** · 01-31-2011 07:11 PM

Yeah...what Stressed said!!!

I'd say "I'm sorry".....but I'm not...because I think without a doubt this is the best thing for you. You have a lot of great things ahead...now you're opening the door for them.

**Brokenwings** · 02-01-2011 07:26 AM

You both were correct he did ask for me back saying he will change. what is wrong with these men, its like it seems you really dont want to be with me and when i say ok goodbye you run back.

i will never understand men lol

**WildChild** · 02-01-2011 10:44 AM

Originally Posted by Brokenwings

i will never understand men lol

To paraphrase something I heard somewhere:
Men may conquor the world but women civilize it.

There are some good men in the world but in general a lot of people male and female, will treat you the way you let them.

**JadedQueen** · 02-15-2011 06:14 AM

I was like that when I got divorced. I was unhappy for several years before I finally decided to throw in the towel. I wasn't heart broken or sad, he did the same asking me to come back and said he'd go to counseling and things would change. I just didn't have it in me to give it another try. I had been telling him I was unhappy for years and suggested various things but his reaction was "if you don't like it leave". After hearing that for years, I decided to leave and he started singing a different tune but it was too little too late.

**Seeker_Advice** · 02-15-2011 09:51 AM

Yes ! Finally......

To take a speech completely out of context but use the words appropriately for this situation:

"Free at last, free at last...thank GOD almighty, I'm free at last"

Never ever settle for anything less than you deserve, ever again!

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 02-15-2011 02:57 PM

People stay, because they think there's nothing better out there, they "think" that they are in love..

Thing is, once the "love" has totally gone, and you view the other person as just that, a person and one you don't really like, only then can you walk...

And, when you do, it is a "relief" because you are finally free and it's exciting because you are in control of your whole new World, your destiny and you can finally be "you"...

Anyone ever makes you feel that you can't be "you", 100%, is trying to change you ...There is no room in anyone's life to be changed to suit someone else, the only word that can be used is compromise, however, I can almost guarantee you that with people that try to change someone, there is no compromise on their behalf, it's all one way..

Good for you, now get out there and do the things you couldn't, be the person you are.

CW

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