Definition of insanity?

**mdraven380** · 06-09-2011 05:19 PM

I was told that the definiton of insanity is repeating the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I guess this is probably true. I see all the red flags everytime but chose to stay in a relationship until the bitter end. Usually until I've invested ever ounce of energy, time, strength and love that I have out of pure desperation not to lose another person from my life. I don't feel emotionally strong enough to do the one thing that everyone has been telling me to do for years. Be alone. Find yourself first. I don't want to be alone and I already know who I am and I know what I want I just can't find it. Everytime I think I've found it, it lasts for about 6 months then their true colors show but I keep pushing forward to try and make things work. I could only pray for the strength to survive the pain of lonliness again. Each time I go through this with another person I feel more weak than the time before. I guess it will always be this way. I think I've really lost all hope this time

**rcoreyus** · 06-09-2011 06:06 PM

Think about how you meet / choose the people you are having relationships with. Maybe you can figure out the signs of problems before you even get into the next one.

**WildChild** · 06-09-2011 06:19 PM

Huzzah!!!
I was so hoping you would see this!
Many of us have been there, done that and are actively working on not going there again.
When you started describing your relationship, I thought, here we go again!
But you had to see it for yourself.

Sweetling you may think you know who you are and what you want but you must become fully a virgin (a woman stands independently) before you look for someone to share life with long term.

The very best thing you could do right now is to marry yourself. Write some vows, promise yourself that you will love you, cherish you and never let anyone negative or who will use you into your life again because now you have you to share with and depend on. Promise to honor yourself and value yourself and listen to your inner voice. Then spend some time seriously working on making this a happy marriage that really works for you. It should be an open marriage, you can have sex with other people and have fun with them but you always have to go home to yourself and keep your love and your heart faithful to you.

Give this some time then you can look at having a polyrelationship or marriage with someone who also loves and has married themselves.

Start by hugging yourself and forgiving yourself for all the things you've put yourself through. Promise that you will do a better job of self care.

**jns** · 06-09-2011 08:50 PM

Hugs to you md. Do what you know is the right thing to do.

**mdraven380** · 06-13-2011 05:53 PM

LOL, Yeah mys sister always says,"here we go again too". I think I'm getting a little closer each time to caring about myself more. I don't want to feel weak anymore.I'm just taking things day by day and making the best of things.
Thanks once again for your words of wisdom.

Originally Posted by WildChild

Huzzah!!!
I was so hoping you would see this!
Many of us have been there, done that and are actively working on not going there again.
When you started describing your relationship, I thought, here we go again!
But you had to see it for yourself.

Sweetling you may think you know who you are and what you want but you must become fully a virgin (a woman stands independently) before you look for someone to share life with long term.

The very best thing you could do right now is to marry yourself. Write some vows, promise yourself that you will love you, cherish you and never let anyone negative or who will use you into your life again because now you have you to share with and depend on. Promise to honor yourself and value yourself and listen to your inner voice. Then spend some time seriously working on making this a happy marriage that really works for you. It should be an open marriage, you can have sex with other people and have fun with them but you always have to go home to yourself and keep your love and your heart faithful to you.

Give this some time then you can look at having a polyrelationship or marriage with someone who also loves and has married themselves.

Start by hugging yourself and forgiving yourself for all the things you've put yourself through. Promise that you will do a better job of self care.