Is he cheating on me.. I know it was immature of me to do this and now I'm confused:(

**fo0lish92** · 11-29-2011 06:28 AM

Okay this might get a little long...
So a while ago me and my friend made a fake facebook account (I know really bad of us) to add people like exes, enemies and stuff. So the other day I added this girl who I completely hate because 2 years ago she tried to break my boyfriend and I up by spreading false rumours about me cheating. She randomly started talking to that fake account while I was on it and I continued the conversation. She then began talking about a mutual friend (Who I'm actually friends with in reality) then all of a sudden she began talking about ME! and my boyfriend! Saying how much she hates me and that my boyfriend cheats on me and that I have no idea about it. I was so shocked, but I'm not sure if she's telling the truth or not. I mean how could she know its me on that fake account, but then again why would she tell someone random? I cant even confront my boyfriend about it because he would get angry about me using a fake account because he thinks its childish and sneaky. So I dont know how to deal with this, because its totally eating me up. Call me immature but I dont know what to do

**Found999** · 11-29-2011 07:33 AM

what you do not know won't hurt you... but based on my own experienced, and it happened to me in real life... my neighborhood and ex hubby had an affair and I didn't know why the woman hated me for no reason...insecurities and jealous because you're the first lady of him and she can't take that...but then I flew when I had enough strength and savings hahaha and I got my job back in my life after he made me a plain housewife but he's putting stain in my head with the lady guard... it will really make him angry because he will be embarassed,and it will be a start of fights between you and bf...so all you have to do is observe and observe!

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-29-2011 01:50 PM

Delete the account.

See, there was a reason why you didn't like her back 2 years ago. She still as you do, holds anger or hatred, (hate that word by the way) and sounds like such a gossiper.

You will never know what truth she speaks and what she doesn't, with snooping people always get a picture, that picture may not be the truth.

Get rid of this account and forget about it.

Want to know if he's cheating? Question yourself on how your relationship is with him, is it happy, is it fun, do you both laugh and is there a need, reason to cheat.

That's your answer.

**fo0lish92** · 11-29-2011 07:51 PM

Thank you both for the advice. It keeps playing on my mind but I've decided not to confront him about it or anything. On questioning my relationship with him, he always seems so happy to be with me, wanting every chance he can get to see me. We talk everyday everyday, and see each other a couple of times a week. The only thing is our sexual life is not very good as I'm still a virgin and he claims he is still as well. Thats what sometimes makes me wonder since we don't do much sexual things he might look elsewhere for that? I dunno, we've been together 4 years now..
Thank you both.

**caterpillar79** · 11-29-2011 07:54 PM

Confirmation bias is at play here. Take your relationship at face value. What he says he'd do and does it actually speaks volumes of who he really is and is not. If what he says don't tie up with his actions, go with his actions.

How old are you? What is your ethnic/cultural/religious background? It may explain why he says he's still a virgin or why he has not initiated sex with you. Also, he might want to "eat his vegetables first before the dessert" (sex). It varies from person to person. Fidn out what he thinks about sex before marriage.

Keep your eyes peeled, your ears open for listening....and your heart ready to accept him with warmth.

**fo0lish92** · 11-29-2011 08:48 PM

He wants to initiate sex with me but I'm the one who always pulls back. Sorry if I'm getting into too much detail here but I find it too painful for me whenever we try. So yeah. He tells me we will do it when I am ready. I'm 19 and so is he. He isn't against sex before marriage or anything its just that everytime we tried it hurt me too much so we kind of just gave up. I don't know if that is my fault or not. Sex isnt a big deal to me I'm happy with my life but maybe he isn't happy...

**jetaime** · 11-30-2011 07:28 AM

I think your mind is overdoing it.
You made that fake account. That girl talked about you and his relationship to the person on that account and now your mind is trying to piece everything together to believe her. You got her side, have you gotten his side? Did you have any suspicions of him cheating before making the Facebook account? Be sure to do that before your mind jumps to further assumptions.

If he isn't happy about you two's not having sex, he wouldn't even try to tell you he'll wait for when you're ready. He respects your wishes, that is a really good thing.

Is he cheating? Well, look at your relationship in it's span of 4 years, has there been any weird/ suspicious changes? Has his behavior changed? Like Found999 said observe and observe!

Ultimately, it's good to take the bull by the horns:
Get rid of that account. Talk with your boyfriend about your suspicion. If he thinks it's childish and sneaky, admit that you were being childish and sneaky- we are humans, humans aren't perfect, they make mistakes. Move forward with your relationship if nothing is proven and do not even think about what that girl told you. Disgruntled females can be pretty poisonous