Ex boyfriend texts me out of the blue. I reply. But he doesn't?

**canadien** · 01-07-2012 07:23 PM

We broke up mutually seven months ago after going out for 1.5 years. I don't want to bore you with the details, but the cause of the breakup was the fact that we both lived too far apart, he had no career ambitions and that he wasn't too committed in the relationship (he chose his drinking buddies over me). The other day he texts me (at 4am BTW!!!), even though we have been no contact since August and wrote, "Hey, its been a long time, how have you been?". I just wrote back and told him I was excited about my first job in my field, that I have recently obtained and had asked him how things were going with him. And he doesn't reply. Why does he blatantly ask an open ended question and doesn't continue on with the conversation?? I didn't care at first, but it's getting a little irritating. What was he trying to accomplish by texting me then not responding??

**grrrr** · 01-08-2012 08:51 AM

I think that a 4am text is a veiled booty call, even though he's so far away.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 01-08-2012 01:09 PM

Sorry hun, I'd change my number

It brings up emotions and often we actually think of something good about the past relationship and if we are not with anyone, we often feel "maybe?"...

Don't go there... He was not compatible with you. He drank, chose mates over you and didn't care for life in the real world, no passions or goals. You do.

4am.... You came to his mind, as obviously he had been out drinking, and so, he decided to text you...Fell asleep... Last thing he expected was for you to talk about your future success

He wanted, "wow, I'm good how are you?" which would have led to him talking about "sex"...grrrrr is right...

Laugh, at least he thought of you, you must have left an impression on his mind

**Maximus** · 01-08-2012 02:01 PM

Yep ! smells like booty call...

Although to give the "man", benefit of the doubt, I would say, sometimes, and at the strangest times of the day, we may reminisce about a past relation and realize how stupid we behaved. An apology followed by well wishes are sometimes overdued...

In any case, nothing to cling on, nor to get yourself in any overdrive.

**grrrr** · 01-08-2012 04:37 PM

Unless he responds to your reply, it was a booty call.

What time did you reply?

**canadien** · 01-08-2012 05:15 PM

Originally Posted by grrrr

Unless he responds to your reply, it was a booty call.

What time did you reply?

Booty call indeed, what a jerk. I responded around the lunch hour, 1pm. I woke up and saw the random text and it took me a few minutes to figure out that it was him (I have deleted his number off my phone). I regret texting him back now. It seems like I gave him the satisfaction and power or something. I'll try not to think too much of this text. I however, made it VERY clear to him that I'm successful and happy

**caterpillar79** · 01-08-2012 07:37 PM

He chose the drinking buddies over you....he is an alcoholic? if that was the case, he was probably drunk when he texted you. Was drunk and thought about you,impulsively texted and didn't like that you are happier now, etc.... He has a lot of issues. Change your number or if you want to keep your number, block his number. You need to move on and not waste a single second on him. Period.

Take care, Canadien.

**canadien** · 01-08-2012 09:40 PM

He is probably an alcoholic now as when we decided to part from one another, he was getting there... He was influenced by horrible friends, that cared little much outside of their partying, drinking and drugs lifestyle. Being dumb, deadbeat 22 year olds essentially. He changed instantly when he started hanging out with those friends... I've realized now, with a clearer mind, that I tried to help him with his life only to be called a nag and taken for granted. Don't get me started on when I was looking for interesting college/ university programs for him and in result being called "NAGGY"(!) I was just trying to be a good gf at the time! Anyways enough with the ranting! Thanks to you all for the awesome feedback!