Thread: Boyfriends Mother is a MONSTER!

Im sorry you have to go through this type of behaviour from her. I had problems with my mother in law too. Your bf needs to step up and stand up for you, if you ever plan to marry him im sure you would like him to stand up for you in a situation like this. Another thing, ignore her, she will push your buttons so much but you have to be strong and ignore her as much as possible.


I remember, just a few weeks before my wedding my husband and his friend went out to play a few games of pool, his friend cannot read that well and had just came to new york so he didnt know his where abouts around here. I was told they should be expected around 2 or 3 am, 5 am came and no one was back, i didnt know what was going on i got angry and restless. That morning my mother in law, tried to convince me that my husband, HER OWN SON will always be like this and that i should think twice before marrying him. In reality she just didnt want me marrying her son, i knew better....I know her son more than she knows him herself, so i knew i wasnt no fool by marrying him. Anyways this just goes to show you how far people can go to destroy what you have, you just be strong and dont let anyone come in between relationship, when she send pictures again to you , just tear it up and laugh, dont bother with her.

I can't believe that a human being could act like this! By continuing to act civilly to her, you should feel like a saint. I admire your patience!
She wants attention. Ignore her. Or kill her with kindness. Eternally be on the side of your boyfriend. Things are probably hard enough for you, having moved out at age 17, without entertaining his evil mommy.
Pretend she doesn't exist is the only advice I can give ... and I've gotta say again you are a GREAT and KIND person for having dealt with her so far!

Thank you both for your advice! It is really hard not to say something to her when she is running her mouth. The only thing that has kept me from saying anything is my boyfriend. He knows how she is but for some odd reason he deals with it. Sometimes I just get soo frustrated I MAKE him say something to her. Which puts him in a bad place. I'm not a mean person and I would never do any of the hurtful things she does. I couldn't be mean to someone with absolutly no reason to. I just dont understand. Some of my friends tell me to act like it doesn't bother me and to be all over my b/f when we are over there showing her that her ignorance isn't affecting our relationship but... once again it is hard for me to act happy when she is treating me like ****. Patricias123- She kinda already did that--- when we used to hang out at her house, she knew I was a freak about babies and knew that I wanted to have kids when I grew up so she would always tell me that Bryant hates babies and he would never agree to have children. But the funny thing is- that we have already picked out names for our babies and plan to have one in 2 years. So, it pretty much looks like she is taking anything she has to brake us up... I dont know why though, I am always nice to her! I would have never thought she would try to come in between us but from the things you two have told me and the similar actions of mother-in-laws I can tell that is what she is doing! I am not going to let it happen... thank you both very much for helping me! I REALLY appreciate it!!!

Busygirl,

WOW!

That's a lot for a young lady like yourself to deal with.

You have a lot of mothers that don't feel that any woman their son becomes seriously involved with is good enough for their son.

She fits the description.

She's saying and doing anything to prevent you 2 from getting any more serious than what you are ... marriage and children.
She sounds like she just wants to have control over her son's life.

Don't acknowledge her messages that she leaves for you.

Oh, and another thing: who keeps telling her all your personal business?
How did she know about your mother cheating on your dad? That's something that should stay between your mother and father--that information shouldn't go beyond the walls of the house; unless a professional therapist or counselor is going to help the couple.

You never--EVER--- tell personal business like that to people. As you can see, they will use it against you to hurt you. I know people like that.

Just hang in there! I've seen a lot of posts that are very similar to yours... so you're not alone.
We'll be glad to chat with you if you want to talk about it.

Well the only reason she found out about it is because I got the phone call from my dad when I was at her house... I didnt really tell her what was going on I just needed a ride home.. of course my b/f knew all along and eventually told his mom because as you can see.... she is very nosey..and kept nagging...if it were up to me, she wouldnt have known anything...now she says something mean about my mom almost everytime I see her! I really regret that I was over there that day! I really regret ever meeting her.... she makes me miserable everyday! I know it is my b/f's mom but it makes me mad everytime she calls his phone! Should I be mad about that? She makes him a nervous wreck but he says if he doesnt talk to her she'll just be worse... is that an excuse for talking to her? He knows how mean she is to me and still acts like nothing is going on... like it is ok that she does that to me... I would really like him to stand up for me... is that too much to ask?

I know how you feel, it just irritates you so much and you feel like you just wanna yell at her and tell her what you really think about her! BUT you be the bigger person here dont let her get to you, its hard i know, but if you explode over her, she will win and get exactly what she wants. My mother in law say things to me only when my husband is not around, so he wont really see her true side against me. The MOST important thing you have to worry about is your relationship with your bf as long as you and him are fine, thats all that matters.

The part where you mentioned his mom makes him a nervous wreck ... that reminds me of my mother. It makes me crazy nervous when I get a phone call from her, absolutely sick to my stomach! She is mentally ill, mentally unstable, and put me through a lot of emotional abuse and stress as a child.
So maybe it would help if you all went to counseling? ESPECIALLY if you are planning on having her grandchildren or marrying her son. Be strong; you're being a VERY good person through all of this and you should be proud of yourself! Especially for sticking up for your boyfriend even against his own mother

"jubes" is right, at first she did not take you as a threat, but now that things are serious she feels you are not good enough for her son..as "little" says kill her with kindness..be ready for any cruel remark she may say and let it roll off your back..