I asked my b/f for another chance and he says that he doesn't know. I asked him if he cares for me and he says yes. I just want to know if we're going to date again or not. He tells me he's not saying it's over so I don't know what to do. He says I'm pushy, is he waiting to see if I quit being pushy? He keeps saying give it time, we'll see, but doesn't tell me it's over.....Please help
Most men are absolute cowards.
They never say it's over.
They say to give them 'space' or 'time'
they say that 'for now' we should 'see
other people', instead of the truth.
I do tend to agree with Kaylar i think you need to stop thinking about him and move on.
I recall your other Threads and in those, you said you pushed for marriage, then backed of when he said it was too early and he wasn't ready.
And, that you were a "pushy" person, basically with him always questioning, why?
You have to go with the flow with relationships, not worry about yesterday, or tomorrow but only NOW....
Enjoy the special feeling of it and just go with the flow.
In other words don't push against the current, just flow down the river.
We sometimes get a bit insecure, regardless of age, and start questioning. But if we continuing questioning, we show that in-security and partners like to feel secure in a relationship, not be constantly questioned how they feel about the other person, it can kind of scare them of.
Be confident, walk tall and don't question just live for the moment and see where it takes you, it's a journey.
I have never asked a man in my life for another chance...If this relationship was not what it should be and I acted in a way that was offensive to him, then this would have told me something about both of us......These words have never been spoken all through my marriage and in all the guys that I have dated in my life....
I guess I have too much pride in myself to ask a man for another chance...not my style...
I replied to you before on several different posts you've made on this same subject. You need to back off and give him some space. You are being to pushy and smothering him. If you don't give him the space he needs and wants you are going to lose him for good. If it is meant to be it will be. And if thats the fact he will seek you out. Don't contact him, give him space and time. You are only making yourself look needy and alot of guys can't stand that.
He says give it time and thats what you need to do. By keeping asking him you are only making it more difficult for yourself. Take this time to find who you are as well and think about things.
I hope everything works out for you. Remember whats meant to be will be and whats not, well then it wasn't worth holding to in the first place.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be and will not be...
Before I read any answers I wish to eat crow.....It will be a very big mouthful....I did not mean to sound like an arrogant as** but I did...I meant to say that women take too much from men...There are too many of us around and they can do this...But so goes life.
Now for me...I forgot that years ago that a man that I had dated for 8 days in a row and was in heat about stood me up.....This was to be our last date before he went back to San Francisco to ship out...I waited and he did not show...He was the only man who has ever done this...To say I was heartbroken would be mild...To say that I was sick is still closer but truly not what I felt....I was devastated...Two weeks later my sailor wrote me...Maybe it was one week I can't recall...In the letter was his picture telling me to put it outside a mouse hole for catching mice or was it throw daggers at it I can't recall...He said if you want to you can write me...I thought of it all of 5 minutes and wrote him....That was the end of December....I loved him and he loved me but I had to be sure...So in September I got a private room on a train and went 2500 miles to see what my feelings were...I had been dating both the Intern and Joe and had to be sure....Seeing him I was sure...He had us in adjoining rooms at a hotel.....I recall the name was the Lankershim.....No longer there still but in my heart....I spent five days with him and then he saw me off at the train.....I wore his class ring until February when he came home and on Valentine's Day I got my diamond.....That November was our wedding...I knew and saw him all of 47 days before we got married....Oh and that night he stood me up he went to a party.....There he proceeded to pork any woman that would stand for it, sit for it or die for it.....That he was not getting from me.....
If I had not given him another chance, I would not be who I am.....I would not be able to look at three children who are both of us.....The perfection of our love.......And worst of all the wonderful song "I left my heart in San Francisco" would not have been written......For the writer was at the station watching two people cry in each other's arms as I boarded that train......And I still love him with all my heart and soul......Please forgive my answer.....Give him a chance...
I am going through the same situation right now and I am really confused. Things were going great. I understand what you're going through. I have been giving him space and not calling. We've been on a break for awhile now so I don't know whether to see other people or wait around for him to make a decision. I really like him and we both aren't interested in seeing other people, but I don't want to be pushy. He has been calling me at least once or twice a week. I figure if he isn't interested anymore he will stop calling and/or be mean on the phone to make me not interested in him. I don't know. Let me know if you have any suggestions. It is very frustrating!
Men are buggers true, it's i don't want you anymore but i don't want anyone else to have you.
Hense he may be saying, he's not interested in anyone else...
Doesn't mean he's thinking like that but i replied that because you are asking the question " if he wasn't interested anymore he would stop calling, i don't know".
I would just say, quit taking the calls for a few weeks, all be it hard to do, reply every now and then later, a couple of days, sorry been busy caught up with a girlfriend, or went out to dinner with mum and dad, see if he tries to re-enter your life.
If you were also "pushy" then you have to do this anyway, as it shows the exact opposite.
Just my opinion.