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  #1  
Old 04-11-2008, 11:43 AM
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Default What Oprah said about men...

My aunt sent me this on Tuesday and it said alot to me. Especially after I almost let the man I was with back in my life, this among things that I've read on here helped me alot...again.

What Oprah said about Men:

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then, heck no, you can’t “be friends.” A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.

Don’t settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think, it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is yourself. Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? (Women who have children from a bunch of different men are no better.) Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are… even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more, nothing less. Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending… compromise is a two way street. You need time to heal between relationships… deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you… a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals… look for someone complimentary… not supplementary. Dating is fun… even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes… when a man always knows where you are, and you’re always readily available to him – he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother’s house. Never co-sign for a man. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Share this with other women and men (just so they know)… you’ll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices, and another woman prepare, and a man aware.

Don't settle for the one you can live with, but wait for the one you can't live without!!!!
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Old 04-15-2008, 04:57 PM
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I really like this!! Oprah sure does know what she's talking about!
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Old 04-16-2008, 09:12 AM
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Randy Paush, the Carnegie Mellon professor who is dying of cancer and gave that "Final Lecture" (you can find it on YouTube but I saw it on Oprah) said this about men -

"And I think all young ladies should hear this...
. When it comes to men that are romantically interested in you, it’s really simple. Just ignore everything they say and only pay attention to what they do. It’s that simple. It’s that easy. "

My mom and dad told me that my whole life, but of course I never listened. A guy can tell you he loves you every day, but he can also hit you. Or cheat on you. Or be disrespectful. And still he says he loves you. So it goes for women of all ages. Only pay attention to what they do. Then you won't have to worry if he's constantly feeding your ego by telling you he loves you, because you'll already know by his actions that he truly does.


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Old 04-16-2008, 11:44 AM
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This is very good advice.
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Old 04-16-2008, 12:17 PM
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I LOVE all of these comments!!!!!!!!!!!! Will try to put them into practice!
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Old 04-16-2008, 03:18 PM
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I love the Randy Paush lecture. It's worth the 70 minutes to watch it.
Just as a side-note: According to Snopes, the original post isn't necessarily from Oprah; it's just good advice. They haven't proven it one way or the other, but they haven't found any proof it IS by Oprah.
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Old 04-16-2008, 07:34 PM
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I have no doubt that he may have had my husband in mind when he said this...He would be the perfect poster boy or man....He only thinkis of me first...
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Old 04-17-2008, 05:06 AM
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I think it's true that women need to open their eyes - many seem to live in a naive self-imposed ignorance. Aslo, don't be angry at us for being the way we are, being angry about reality solves nothing. Being angry that you can't afford a new car or something is ******, so is being upset about the nature of man.

You hate us for it, you love us for it - it just is.
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