What ever you decide, i wouldn't do the video/internet part regardless.
For lots of reasons, ie) your little brother seeing it one day, friends from school days, people at work, just needs one person to recognise you and try to send it on a spaceship around cyber..
Then there's also how you would feel 10 years from now, married and your husband saw it? Your future employment relied on nothing like this ever coming out?
There are some risks worth taking, but in my books there are also some not.
In a loving, trusting relationship, a video "for your eyes only", is norm but look at Paris, Pamela Anderson, they all come out for the world to see.
Because we don't know the future, as i said i wouldn't do it.
And, lastly, i do question why he wants to go to that extreme and let the world see as well...
If you want to find out if he's a jerk, or for real just with loads of fantasies, why not ask him that question.... seems that he doesn't mind 4 of his friends seeing "that video" with them in it...
Just a thought.
CW