Thread: Boyfriend problem! Am I unreasonable?

Before we got married, the minister who was going to perform the ceremony talked to the two of us. One of his points was that sometimes there will be something that is very important to one of you - even if it is not all that rational to want it. (He was talking about a car or a vacation, not oral sex I think <g>). He suggested that if it is practical, it is good to try to go along with these wishes.

I think this is a good thought in relationships. Sometimes on partner really wants something - they can't explain exactly why, and it may not make a lot of sense, but if practical it is nice to go along with it.

Now, this CANNOT be applied to a long list of things, I feel it is reserved for that very rare thing they really really want. It also must be a 2-way street. Also if it is too expensive, or too impractical, or in this case too unpleasant for the other partner, don't do it. But try.

If someone has their heart set on going to a dude-ranch and playing a cowboy for a week. If you can afford the time / money go do it. Doesn't matter that it will be dusty, tiring, and maybe not nearly as much fun as they hope - they won't be left alwasy wishing they had done it.

If someone really wants a red convertable (and you can afford one), get it - don't worry about the gas mileage, or practicality.

But you can't do all of those things.

So - if your partner really really wants oral (and finishing in your mouth), and it is really important to them, I'd suggest you really try. But when you want to spend an evening each week taking ballroom dancing lessons, or really want to go to Buchart gardens on superbowl sunday, he should go along. (sorry about the cliche desires - maybe you want to take up motorcycle racing, or sport fishing).

Originally Posted by pinkgirl

Ok, just to confirm - I was wearing comfy pyjamas. I would not dress sexy then turn down sex etc. because that's just teasing and mean.

Since the original post, I have compromised and given it more of a try but I still really dislike the taste/texture. The thing is, it's really hard not to look like I'm really not liking it when he cums in my mouth and that's a problem because then he says he feels bad because I'm not enjoying it! But he still wants it... then I think why is he always asking me to do something he can see (and knows) I dislike? I know it feels good for him, but should he want me to be doing something I dislike so much for his pleasure?

Also it's not like I don't want to go down on him at all - I like the pleasure it gives him and I like the act of doing it, just not the end result in my mouth!!

And yes, I know many have pointed out that switching from mouth to hand etc. at the end can be unsatisfying but surely it's not THAT bad. Better than no oral? Or oral whilst knowing that your girlfriend is not enjoying it and really dislikes having your cum in her mouth?

You are completely right in your thinking....NO woman should be forced to swallow...If you want to then you should do what you enjoy....I would not make any concessions....You are not wrong....I give my husband oral all the time....I love it and he does too but he is a man that thinks it is disrespectful to ejaculate in a woman's mouth.....I have done this when I worked him well but our satisfaction is in full sexual intercourse with his finishing inside me where we both can enjoy it....

I truly wonder how many marriages have gone to **** because of this....I am serious.....Ever wonder why the woman stops blowing the guy after marriage...She hated it to start but it was part of getting him......This is a woman's trick but probably 90% of them hate it.....However, there are times in deep erotic lust that anything goes....This does not go very often...Many spit and many get loaded or high so they can do their thing for him as a favor....I, personally, believe that this act is only wonderful if you are in the deepest animal like sensual wanting there is.....What is there any fun for a woman to sit and pump a man for his ejaculate....Then I hear the words but we don't have to do you.....The thing is that a woman does not need a man to drink her ejaculate.....She can get off either way......We love to suck a man but the residue is just that.......Residue...

Just my thoughts.....

Originally Posted by anonymouswhitefemale

What about eating faeces? We both have that, is that the same? One thing is sexual, the other is not.
Uh, ok, if you want to. So, your partner wants you to eat ****e. It wows her to no end but you just cant physically get it down or whatever. You want to please her right? You gonna do it?

I think that men should do whatever they can to ensure that their woman is sexually fulfilled, even if it's things that they may not be dying to do. And vica versa.
I agree

Ok, but what I am saying is that things can be unintentionally sexy. This guy might find pajamas really sexy...
I get your point. He is turned on by her no matter what she wears. Thats great that he desires her like that but in the originals post, she had already told him she was tired and no. I already stated that she should not ask him to cuddle or be close to her with him all turned on and turned down.

I think this has been and will forever be a bone of contention between the sexes. Its would be awesome if two people can just click in all ways sexually. When they like everything the other does and visa versa. More often than not, one partner thinks of, asks for, desires, likes, dislikes...whatever... one or more things their partner does or doesnt. Compramise and find even ground.