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Thread: HELP!!! Im dating a married man

  1. #21
    VIP Member Array just4me's Avatar
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    To you staceyboo0629 that is the most wonderful thing I've read in a very long time. That touched me profoundly. Thank you for that.


    To you redrose, I have been where you are. I gave alittle over 3 years to the married man I was involved with. It can be so very painful and so very wonderful all at the same time. But my advice is the same as the others. Read the post from stacey, it's wonderul. I came on here as you did looking for advice and hurting as much as you. Some look down on us for what we have done, others, though know its wrong, give us some of the most uplifting advice. Chandlers Wish and Fallen1 were great supporters for me.

    I wish I could tell you it's easy to do, but it's not. It does get easier though, and you do become stronger. As someone on here told me, remember YOUR self-worth. Don't worry about his hurts, only your own.

    I hope you find strength and do what's right for YOU. Best of luck and love to you.
    True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be and will not be...

  2. #22
    VIP Member Array justkimmie's Avatar
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    My entire life has been turned upside down.

    She was/is my husbands "friend"...we have had our share of problems, but because of this we are now heading to divorce court.

    This woman, his friend, is now pregnant by another man, who's own wife is also pregnant. It has been a long, rough year, all I can say is that I will be so much better off once this is done.
    And I can say to them...well...do you honestly think they are going to be faithful to you??!! You know what they say, 'how you got him...is how you lose him'.
    Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 10-06-2008 at 09:13 PM. Reason: inappropriate comment
    ~Kim

  3. #23
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    Smile

    Been there, done that, and still paying the price after 6 years. Be very careful what you do. This can be a long and painful relationship for you. Think of Christmas, New Years, & Valentines Day always alone. As well as probably your birthday and forget about ever celebrating his birthday with him, he'll be with his family. You will not make plans with other people thinking you need to be available in case he calls to see you. Be strong, look elsewhere for a relationship and save yourself the wasted years and heartache.

    You say you work with him? Everyone will find out and you'll get labled where you work as the girl who goes out with married men. All the married men willl chase you, the single ones won't be interested and the women will be afraidk you are after their me.

    By the way, your not a bad person. Things happen. I know you feel bad for his wife, but right now you need to think of yourself and the consequences to you. I am ready for therapy because of my relationship.

    Be strong and walk away, walk away now!

  4. #24
    WH Super Moderator Array caterpillar79's Avatar
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    As early as possible walk away. It will be harder to do so once you've invested a lot of emotional effort and all. I have had a sort of similar experience, the only difference was that the j_rk tricked me/lied to me. As a result I have trust issues that I keep on trying to improve.

    It is also very painful when you're out of it - moving on. You'll feel so alone and scared ... also indifferent, as if the world had judged you. But don't allow yourself to wallow into this. Get therapy as soon as possible - you need it.

    Take care and keep us posted.
    What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility. - Leo Tolstoy

    The clearest explanation for failure of any marriage is that two people are incompatible; that is, one is male and the other female. - Anna Quindlen

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  5. #25
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    HI
    I agree with everyone. !!! and I have my own issues but...... pick up your basket and move on!.. set it straight with him at work. ( could be issues there . is he your co worker. same dept? boss?) right now every one needs there job .. so dont' take a chance in losing it !!!!. do what you have to......
    I get the feeling that you are young..and is he older?? so you should be enjoying yourself !!! so chalk it up.. as a stepping stone and move on. If he was divorced then
    maybe???? ... there may be problems in his marriage but... It is NOT you that needs to fixed it for him.. Thing about what you are really getting from this? whats the fix
    sanity

  6. #26
    TEAM ADMIN Array CHANDLERS WISH's Avatar
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    Please not that this thread in old, 2008 .....

    Look at the left hand side and it will tell you the last poster reply....

    Thread closed.
    Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
    It doesn't happen over night
    if truth were to be told.

    Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
    you must believe!

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