your welcome, glad to put my two cents in.

Wow! I Thought I Was The Only Woman That Enjoyed Anal Sex! I Orgasm Faster Doing It That Way! I Know Most Woman Say Take It Slow Yada Yada Yada... Not Me! The Harder The Better! I Learned It Is Even Better If You Get On Top (facing Him). That Way Your Clitoris Rubs Against Him... Then You Get Clitoral And Anal Pleasure!

Years ago, during foreplay, my Ball & Chain mentioned it.
So ended all sexual connection for the next 48 hours,
and he hasn't raised the subject again for the past
25 years.

It is not something that will happen in this or any other
life time.

I didn't like it at first, but it took me a while to get used to it. My husband used to bug me about it from time to time. I guess it's a give and take. I am a 30+ year old mother of two. Let's just say that I don't feel sexy many times, but my hubbie always manages to do so...and not just during sex. We agree to have anal about every third time that we have sex. Every time we do (anal or not), he makes me reach orgasm several times (orally, manually, during vaginal sex, etc.) It's a must for him (maybe a pride thing, but hey, I'm not complaining!) When we do have anal, it's always after having vaginal sex for a while. It's been easier to get used to because we usually have sex for over an hour and a half every time, even those times when we have anal. I've tolerated it at first, but I am enjoying it now (for about 45 minutes or so each time). He is, let's say, very attentive to pleasing me, which makes me feel good...and sexy. We try many positions and he isn't a one-position jackhammer (uugh!). During anal, he always uses plenty of lube and stimulates me with his fingers to the point where I orgasm about twice each time...it's important to him. He's made it easy to get used to, but he is the first that has. As far as the numbing lube, it's called Anal Ease. I used it before, but it only numbs him! We either use vaseline or the new silicon based lubricants that don't dry out (a bit expensive though). It definitely isn't everyone's cup of tea. Hopes this helps.

I can see how it can be gross, after all, isn't it an exit? My husband has taken it slowly over the years. In the past, if I wanted it to stop because it was too painful, he would stop. I also have to be in the mood to have it, even though he makes me climax that way. I'm used to it now, and actually enjoy it. I always use an enema about an hour or two before I know that we're going to have it...gotta feel fresh, you know? It definitely is not for everyone. Hey, he is a good cook, a great father to our two children, my family loves him, he's romantic, successful, has a good sense of humor, knows how to iron and even does the laundry. I guess having anal once in a while isn't bad at all!

My wife of 21 years and I are finally begining to explore the vast possibilities of our sexlife.... anal has been talked about and we're both interested in what it holds for us..... what are the best positions to use.... how deep can I realistically go? Any suggestions and info will be greatly appreciated!!!

This topic seems to come up a fair bit around here. No secrete that I am an advocate of sorts for at least giving it a try.

Gotta say, numbing lubes like anal eez...bad bad. One, pain is the body's way of telling us something is wrong. If you can't feel it you wouldnt know something might be amis. The tissue in the anus is very sensitive and thin and could tear or scratch. The sphincters (rings of muscle at the opening) should be stretched slowly not torn open. Muscle doesnt heal well. Two, as numb as it makes a woman, it also desensetises the man. Where is the pleasure in that.

To much lube is not enough. Start small and work up slowly. Being aroused and even having an orgasm beforehand helps. Love the rimming personally. RELAX. Well, relax as much as possible. Breath deep and put your head in the zone so to speak. Don't clench. Try different positions. What works for one may not work for the other. Trust that you or your partner will stop if one or the other says stop. NEVER go from anal to vaginal... bad bad. Some people like to prepare beforehand... A bowel movement and and enema. A long hot shower. Glass of wine (heh) Some people prefer to use condoms.

Once the initial entry is over, it just depends on how your partner is tolerating it that determines speed, depth, rythem and such. Again, LUBE. The rectum is not self lubricating like the vagina and even if you have managed to get through the initial stages, its good to add more to get lube on the inside the length of the shaft at least. There are also some lube syringes out there that may help with internal lubrication.

Something to consider. You may have had anal sex before but it is important to start out slow each and every time. The sphincter returns to its orginal shape/size and needs to be relaxed each and every time. Having done it once is not like the vagina that is more accepting and accomodating each time. Anal gets progressively easier because each time we do it we get an idea of what to expect the next time.

I have intense orgasms during anal. Clitoral stimulation helps as well. Give her a reach around so to speak. Going to add too... men have been known to enjoy anal play as much as women. Same "rules" apply. Prostate stimulation can give men mind blowing orgasms. People seem to either like anal or they dont. Dont knock it till you try it tho.

Does that mean you do not give or recieve oral either?

I love anal sex if it is done correctly! If it done correctly it does not hurt (no need to use "numbing" gunk!) and many women, myself included, are able to orgasm from it... sometimes the orgasms from anal sex are stronger than from vaginal sex!