Virgin pride!! ;)

**reilu** · 12-06-2008 02:20 PM

okay girls. i KNOW i'm not the only one out there. i'm currently a senior in high school, and i'm still a virgin. here's the thing. i'm not one of those people who is against having sex before marriage.(i'm not dissin' their morals though) to me, marriage is just a legal paper. you can be married without being "married". (does any one follow me?) it's just that i believe that sex is a completely beautiful thing between two people, and any more people treat it like gimmie gimmie gimmie. the whole beauty of it is becoming lost (for a lot of people, but not all) i don't want to have sex with just any random person. i want it to be special, you know. even if my first time isn't with the man that i ultimately end up "marrying". it just makes me mad when my friends look at me like i am at a loss because i am still a virgin at eighteen. i'm sorry, but i feel like i just have more self control than them. what's wrong with waiting for a while? anything? i don't feel like i'm underpriveledged. any way, i just felt like talking to any one who wanted to talk about this, any one else that feels that way. plus, i just joined yesterday, and i would like to get to know some people!

**hello_pitty** · 12-06-2008 03:28 PM

I was a virgin until I was 18!! I thought this boy was the right one at the time, we had been dating for 2 years on and off and we fell in "love". Well it turned out that he just wanted bragging rights that he got to "pop my cherry" and dumped me 2 weeks after....it hurt so bad and I felt used and disgusting.

Please don't let your friends EVER pressure you into doing that. They probably are jealous of you that you didn't go out and have sex with anyone like they did!

Sex is a very beautiful thing between a man and a woman. It should be special especially if it is your first time. Don't ever feel like you need to "fit in" with the other girls...an unwed girl who is a virgin is pretty rare, especially at your age, it's very special and the guys are going to want it....don't give in until you are SURE you are ready...and you're right, you don't have to be married to have sex and it doesn't make you a bad person if you have sex outside of marriage. Oh and boys/ men will pressure you and throw the "L" word at you to get in your pants...if they pressure you or make you feel bad, then they just want one thing....if they can wait until YOU'RE ready, then he's a keeper

The way I see it, is if you can stay a virgin and save yourself for your future husband, that is the most WONDERFUL gift you can give him! I wish I would have waited to give myself to my fiance...sigh....I was young and dumb LOL oh well he loves me no matter what!

good luck girl! and BE PROUD!!!

**reilu** · 12-06-2008 04:38 PM

thanks!! it makes me happy to see that there are other people who have the same views as i do. i want to wait for a while. i don't think that there is any rush. i mean, once i do find the right person (it'll surely take a couple tries, i'm sure) we'll have the rest of our lives to enjoy that together. why just do it to do it? i want it to be worth something. anyway, thanks for your response. i'm taking that one to heart!!

**zeos133** · 12-06-2008 04:56 PM

yeah, there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. I'd recommend not telling the guys you're dating until it looks like they're really into you. Otherwise they might just stay with you just so they can break you in.

**hello_pitty** · 12-06-2008 06:08 PM

Originally Posted by zeos133

yeah, there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. I'd recommend not telling the guys you're dating until it looks like they're really into you. Otherwise they might just stay with you just so they can break you in.

Very wise words!!! Write this one down LOL

**reilu** · 12-07-2008 11:53 AM

why is that though? there is this one guy that i know that always insists that we are going to do it together. he knows i'm a virgin. why do guys like virgins so much? i always thought they would want a girl that had some experience, you know? why do they wanna break them? it just seems odd that they have that goal. ha ha! guys are hard to figure! any idea boys?

**WildChild** · 12-07-2008 01:27 PM

Never did figure that one out. But you do what is comfortable for you.

**silvertae** · 12-07-2008 01:37 PM

Originally Posted by reilu

why is that though? there is this one guy that i know that always insists that we are going to do it together. he knows i'm a virgin. why do guys like virgins so much? i always thought they would want a girl that had some experience, you know? why do they wanna break them? it just seems odd that they have that goal. ha ha! guys are hard to figure! any idea boys?

They want to be the one that you finally "surrender" to. It's a power trip.

**zeos133** · 12-07-2008 01:47 PM

Originally Posted by reilu

why is that though? there is this one guy that i know that always insists that we are going to do it together. he knows i'm a virgin. why do guys like virgins so much? i always thought they would want a girl that had some experience, you know? why do they wanna break them? it just seems odd that they have that goal. ha ha! guys are hard to figure! any idea boys?

somewhere in the history of our society some guy decided it would be cool to sleep with as many virgins as possible, thus creating one of the dumbest trends known to mankind. haha

I think in more ancient or traditional societies there were lots of reasons why having a virgin was considered best. Probably has something to do with purity and the fact that a lot of men are very possessive of their women. This belief still exists in many parts of the world. But this belief is more geared towards marrying a virgin, which I can understand, and in some ways still think is good, though not necessary.

But the whole concept of it being a good thing to marry a virgin somehow got misconstrued by modern society as sleeping with a virgin is desirable. I've never been with a virgin myself, but I've heard that usually its not all that great. I think some guys think that a virgin will be extra tight and so it will feel good, but that seems pretty perverted.

I had a friend in college that was a virgin and I was always trying to get with her. We fooled around quit a bit, but she never gave into me mainly because she knew I just wanted to have the experience of sleeping with a virgin. Good for her though. It really wasn't that important to me. We're actually still good friend today.

So, to answer your question. Its a modern fad rooted in historical beliefs.

**zeos133** · 12-07-2008 01:48 PM

Originally Posted by silvertae

They want to be the one that you finally "surrender" to. It's a power trip.

wow, that's intense. Probably true for some guys, but certainly not all.

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