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Old 12-28-2008, 10:38 AM   #1
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Default A couple of questions re: rear entry sound effects

I've been with my boyfriend that I totally adore for several months now. We are close and comfortable with each other - but I have never passed gas in front of him until recently (He never has). I am an extremely insecure person to begin with, always picking apart my flaws and going over everything i think I did/said wrong in my head constantly. So this situation, silly as it sounds has devistated me quite a bit.

Recently we had backdoor sex for the very first time, as he was entering me and backing away - I made a fart-like sound. He didn't seem to let it phase him and we proceeded as though it hadn't happened. Everything was fine after - I was totally clean, it was just air but still embarrasing as all heck.

I didn't talk about it, neither did he. I was hoping he would know it wasn't something I did on purpose, I didn't feel it coming at all just pow bang, air sounds out of nowhere. I didn't beat myself up about it too much.

But in the couple day's following the encounter I have had a handful of similiar incidents- no warning - no stomach pain - no pressure - just pow bang boom a gas sound. Unfortunately a couple of these happened right in front of him (not in a sexual situation). I said excuse me, and he didn't act like he was disgusted or anything - and really just ignored it . But he didn't seem as interested in touching me as he usually is (or maybe I am just overanalyzing) So I began to worry that maybe he thinks I am a gross pig or something just popping off farts willy nilly when its not the case.

My first question is, is it normal to be desensitized to air pressure leading up to an embarassing gas sound following an anal sex encounter? I read somewhere that it happens to a lot of people and is not much to worry about. I guess I just want to hear if that is experienced by others.

And second, how do you handle such a moment - when its not in your nature at all to be comfortable with that. I said excuse me, I didn't know what else to do as it hasn't happened to me before. Should I expect that this may cause him to like/respect me less? Should I bring up the fact that It's not something I would normally just do on purpose and that its just a temporary side effect (cost of admission) to that area of town? Or am I blowing this way out of proportion because I am such an insecure freak?
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Old 12-28-2008, 11:56 AM   #2
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I wish I could edit this post to say- that my worrying was for nothing. I talked to him about it and he could care less and was so sweet and funny about it. He put me totally at ease. I really need to quit being so hard on myself. I guess I had the answer in me before I even asked the question: talk to him about how I felt. It has always made me feel better before, and did so now -- even with something embarrassing to talk about
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Old 12-28-2008, 04:29 PM   #3
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you are not a freak, but you are blowing it way out of proportion. If you two love each other and are comfortable with each other then there's nothing you need be worried about. I've been with my husband 5 years and we know that its normal to pass gas. everybody does it. we do it in front of each other and he still loves me and I love him. omg...there's more room on the outside than on the inside. talk about your concerns with him and you both will feel better. when it happens again you both will be ok with it.
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Old 12-29-2008, 02:30 AM   #4
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Thank you starving. Even I, after re-reading what I wrote, had to shake my head at how I manage to turn the littlest things into worry-fests that I literally lose sleep over.

It was a human error, and there was nothing I could do about it. He wasn't bothered by it and yet me ,(overthinker extaordinairre) I was worried maybe he'd find me less sexy because of it. There is no one among us that can be perfect and I am so very far from it. He goes out of his way to make sure that I feel valued and appreciated and always reassures me when I feel insecure about myself. I don't know why I thought this would be any different. Pretty silly retrospectively, but at the time I typed it - I felt very concerned and upset with myself.
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Old 12-29-2008, 03:22 PM   #5
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This is very cute. Because you are forcing air in and out of that area, naturally some air will come out just after he takes it out. Of course, you wouldn't have known this until you tried it. Also, remember to give yourself a pat on the back, a lot of women won't even let a man near that area, so kudos to you for being sexually open to trying new things.
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Old 12-29-2008, 07:31 PM   #6
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The first time I tried sex in this way, I spent the next day sitting on the toilet with the constant feeling that I was going to have uncontrollable gas, or even worse. :-) It is something new and I commend you for being open to trying new things. Through trying new things, you and your guy will discover many things about each other and will become even more comfortable. I'm glad to see you talked with him and are feeling better about this.
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Old 12-29-2008, 07:48 PM   #7
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I think until you have been with someone for several years, you will always worry about the little things.

The fun and excitement of it all, when with the right partner, is establishing that nothing really matters, it's all good.

It's a growth, and together you grow, as one, getting to know each other bit by bit along the way.

Congratulations, seems like you picked a stayer and a winner.

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Old 02-26-2009, 09:38 PM   #8
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I love some of the words you use. lol willy nilly. Anywho, I have yet to pass gas in front of my man. But, I only do in front of my son. I cant even d oit in front of my brother or dad and we used to ALL THE TIME when I was little. lol. I dont know why I am insecure about this now. Shoot, I have no problem burping super loud. But I can see the difference. Glad you are good now.
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Old 02-27-2009, 10:01 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork View Post
And second, how do you handle such a moment - when its not in your nature at all to be comfortable with that.
I find muttering "oops" works for me. Passing gas is a normal body function that sometimes makes a little noise.
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Old 02-27-2009, 11:45 AM   #10
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Lol Skipper. "Oops". haha.

I pass gas in front of NOONE except my dog. LOL. And since she so relentlessly lets it fly in my presence, I figure I owe her a few.
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