hubby wont touch me

**cassie66** · 12-30-2008, 01:40 PM

we havent had as much sex as i would like lately, probb down to me having a cyst. but i knew right from the begining he had a phobia about touching. i just thought in time he would try, but no

his idea of sex is forhim to get on top of me no foreplay ever put it sraight in for 2mins and get off thats it!

he has never ever touched a woman down below with finger or mouth and never will
ive tried to talk to him about it he just says he cant, says its disgusting,dirty, gross and hairy. i wash every day and offered to shave but no

yet i always do a full works on him as he says he cant work if i dnt kiss him

these days he is neve rin the mood, always tired or has some ache or pain everytime i mention love making. he says i keep pressurising him. i just wnat a sex life. is that to much to ask? he is only 32. he wont french kiss me either says thats disgusting too! help!

**starvingforsex** · 12-30-2008, 01:46 PM

OCD....Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, sounds like it to me. It's not you hun. Research it, you might find some answers. Doubt he's gonna change either. Put up or shut up, that's your choices. You had to know before you married him...it's something he can't help.

Sassy_Tats · 12-30-2008, 01:49 PM

Were you not sexual at all before you two were married?

**starvingforsex** · 12-30-2008, 01:54 PM

Yes we were, always initiated by me. My husband has a self image problem and performance anxiety. Maybe yours does too.

**cassie66** · 12-30-2008, 02:12 PM

yes we werei just thought in time he would touch me, but he wont and the more i pressure him, the more annoyed he gets. he is always washing his hands.

Merry · 12-30-2008, 02:18 PM

I agree OCD, some medications can help, but I doubt you will convince him to go to the doctor.

**cassie66** · 12-30-2008, 02:27 PM

i do agree he may need a therapist. but dare not suggest this, i know he would never go

Sassy_Tats · 12-30-2008, 02:43 PM

if HE doesnt want to go, how about asking him go with YOU... act like its you?

Rosslyn · 12-30-2008, 02:55 PM

Perhaps couples therapy? Could be a good way to start the process of getting him into the therapy he needs. Sounds like OCD to me, but I don't have enough information to be completely sure. But if you go to therapy, the therapist will be able to tell.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 12-30-2008, 04:25 PM

I agree with the others that it's most likely some sort of OCD. I commend you for trying to make things work despite this problem. As others have said, it's HIM not YOU. Don't forget that. A womans body is beautiful, not nasty, not dirty etc. And wow...to have gone all this time married to a man that won't give you that sort of intimacy......I feel for you!

Does he have the same feelings about his own genital area? Are they dirty, nasty and disgusting also?

12-30-2008, 01:40 PM	#1
cassie66 Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: chesterfeild, england Posts: 346	hubby wont touch me we havent had as much sex as i would like lately, probb down to me having a cyst. but i knew right from the begining he had a phobia about touching. i just thought in time he would try, but no his idea of sex is forhim to get on top of me no foreplay ever put it sraight in for 2mins and get off thats it! he has never ever touched a woman down below with finger or mouth and never will ive tried to talk to him about it he just says he cant, says its disgusting,dirty, gross and hairy. i wash every day and offered to shave but no yet i always do a full works on him as he says he cant work if i dnt kiss him these days he is neve rin the mood, always tired or has some ache or pain everytime i mention love making. he says i keep pressurising him. i just wnat a sex life. is that to much to ask? he is only 32. he wont french kiss me either says thats disgusting too! help!

12-30-2008, 02:27 PM	#7
cassie66 Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: chesterfeild, england Posts: 346	i do agree he may need a therapist. but dare not suggest this, i know he would never go __________________ blaze is the messiah

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Climax without touch?	Hystorm	Sex	10	01-29-2009 10:28 AM
masterbating vs. sex with hubby	elle36	Sex	26	07-15-2008 03:42 PM
can someone please help me? it wont take long	bsa09dancer	Sex	4	04-06-2008 01:03 AM
Massage Therapy: The Power of Structured Touch	imported_Womens-Health.com	General	0	06-13-2006 10:15 AM

12-30-2008, 01:46 PM	#2
starvingforsex VIP Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: shrewsbury, PA Posts: 31	OCD....Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, sounds like it to me. It's not you hun. Research it, you might find some answers. Doubt he's gonna change either. Put up or shut up, that's your choices. You had to know before you married him...it's something he can't help.

12-30-2008, 01:49 PM	#3
Sassy_Tats Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: out of my mind Posts: 11	Were you not sexual at all before you two were married?

12-30-2008, 01:54 PM	#4
starvingforsex VIP Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: shrewsbury, PA Posts: 31	Yes we were, always initiated by me. My husband has a self image problem and performance anxiety. Maybe yours does too.

12-30-2008, 02:12 PM	#5
cassie66 Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: chesterfeild, england Posts: 346	yes we werei just thought in time he would touch me, but he wont and the more i pressure him, the more annoyed he gets. he is always washing his hands.

12-30-2008, 02:18 PM	#6
Merry Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 25	I agree OCD, some medications can help, but I doubt you will convince him to go to the doctor.

12-30-2008, 02:43 PM	#8
Sassy_Tats Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: out of my mind Posts: 11	if HE doesnt want to go, how about asking him go with YOU... act like its you?

12-30-2008, 02:55 PM	#9
Rosslyn Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 23	Perhaps couples therapy? Could be a good way to start the process of getting him into the therapy he needs. Sounds like OCD to me, but I don't have enough information to be completely sure. But if you go to therapy, the therapist will be able to tell.

12-30-2008, 04:25 PM	#10
Beautiful Disaster Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: United States - Kentucky Posts: 501	I agree with the others that it's most likely some sort of OCD. I commend you for trying to make things work despite this problem. As others have said, it's HIM not YOU. Don't forget that. A womans body is beautiful, not nasty, not dirty etc. And wow...to have gone all this time married to a man that won't give you that sort of intimacy......I feel for you! Does he have the same feelings about his own genital area? Are they dirty, nasty and disgusting also?