aeal121

So I'm 21 and sexually active, but I haven't had a ton of experience. I'm also not that good at verbalizing what I want or asking what he wants during sex. I think talking kinda ruins the spontaneity of it. So basically, I just guess what he wants, and a lot of times I know I'm guessing right but I have a few questions about what's most common.

1) So here's the situation: We're having sex with a condom, and he tells me he's about to cum. What do I do? Let him cum inside since we're using protection? Have him pull out and then finish him with oral and swallow? What do most people do, i.e. what does he expect/want?

2) I've heard everywhere that men hate pillow talk and cuddling after sex (i.e. When Harry Met Sally, etc.). Do they really? I love it. Should I feel guilty for making him do it?

3) Does he hate it that I don't talk or moan during sex? Sometimes I'll whisper in his ear or let my breathing tell him what I'm feeling, but does he want me to talk dirty? I hate that and would rather not. I feel like a skank-ho when I do. What's normal?

WildChild

You will only get answers to what he wants or expects by talking to him. Why have him pull out if you are using protection? A lot of times talking about cumming helps him (or her) push it over the edge to get there. Some men like to cuddle after, for most it seems to vary, just go with the flow - don't rely on movies to get your info.
Just talk to him sometime when you aren't in bed.

Beautiful Disaster

WC is right. The only real answers will come from him because everyone is different. BUT, I'll tell you what I've found from my own experience, but you must remember, this is me...not him. :-)

1. It's whatever you two are comfortable with. If you're not on the pill, I can see why you'd worry about condom breakage. But for me, I never wanted to put a guys penis in my mouth after he had a condom on. I think they taste disgusting. There's nothing wrong with having him pull out right upon cumming and finish him with your hand.

2. Pillow talk... most guys I've ever known like sex talk. Obviously, if you're cheesy and rehearsed it's probably a turnoff. But just some good honest sex talk.....yeah, most guys like that. Tell him what you want to do to him, vice versa. Tell him how hot you think he is....and you can even talk about his "member" a bit as long as you're making it sound like the best thing ever. Cuddling after sex....lots of guys don't like this. Not that they don't want to touch you, but they don't want you rubbing all over them right after they orgasm. Some nice, easy cuddling is typically fine.

3. This is truly different for every guy. Some guys wanna hear you moan as sort of a "yeah you're doing it right" signal. I like to talk dirty a bit, UNTIL a guy TELLS me to do it and then I go blank and feel like I'm a porn star or something. haha. But as I said in 2. most guys I've known do like to hear your thoughts about the situation DURING the situation.

Phoebee

Being able to tell a man what you want and need is THE most important thing you can do to make your sex life great. Repeat after me

Harder
Softer
To your left
YOUR OTHER LEFT!
To your right
Higher!
Lower.....
Faster!
Slower....
Don't stop!

__________________
"Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got." ~ Janis Joplin

rcoreyus

I'm a guy (but of course different men like different things)

1. We don't use condoms. My wife won't do oral. If she would (which I would love), I would enjoy doing different things - sometimes finishing during intercourse, sometimes orally, sometimes by hand - or whatever else we can think of. I think variety is important - otherwise sex can get routine.

2. I love cuddling after sex. I'm normally so high strung that it is the only time I can relax.

3. I very much like it when my wife tells me what she wants. I'm not into really sleazy Fxxx Me with that XXX XXASSDXX, but I really do want to know what she likes. Noises of pleasure (not faked please!) are always a good thing.