HPV and talking to boyfriend.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 01-19-2009 05:20 AM

Considering I dont know the conversation you had with him, I don't want to place too much judgement. Bottom line, its your body, you're worried sick, you havent been w anyone else....and you SHOULD be able to talk to him. My opinion, he shouldve been asking YOU questions about your fidelity and then once you confirmed it, he should've been assuring you.
Once I had some weird uncomfortable bumps appear in that area. I was in an exclusive serious relationship. But I couldn't help but worry. Mine were uncomfortable,burned and stinged. I talked to him about it...we talked about STD's and I remember him telling me "If you truly haven't been with anyone else...then I promise you you didn't get anything from me". Made me feel better, and they went away. (Some sort of allergy or irritation I assume).

I'm sorry he couldn't provide you the assurance I know you need right now. I hope your tests come back negative and you can move past this.

**Hopeless Dork** · 01-19-2009 06:00 AM

Do you guys use condoms or spermicides or anything like that? Sometimes allergies can cause bumps or irritation.

**WildChild** · 01-19-2009 09:01 AM

Wow, what did you say? Or he just immature? Regardless of the test results, you've got some thinking to do about this relationship.

**Little** · 01-19-2009 09:09 AM

Wow, how did you say it? I mean, in your thread you're basically accusing him of cheating and having an STD; very few people would handle that well. Especially if, like you said, he's very proud of being clean. It was still an immature reaction from him, but you're dealing with a very sensitive topic.

**Jettpack** · 01-19-2009 03:19 PM

Uhhh I didn't see anywhere in this thread that I accused him of cheating. I couldn't even imagine him cheating on me.
I was calm, and i explained everything to him, and how i think it happend and that if it is HPV there was nothing he could have done about it since he didn't know. I didn't blame him for doing anything. He was just mad at me for even bringing it up without having a doctor say i have it. I dont know what is wrong with him, if he wa upset, or embarassed. I have no idea. I guess I'm just going to give him some time to process it, and let him know the results wednesday. I really dont know what else to do at this point. I rather this not ruin our relationship.

**Jettpack** · 01-19-2009 03:22 PM

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

Do you guys use condoms or spermicides or anything like that? Sometimes allergies can cause bumps or irritation.

and no we dont use any of that. It literally just came out of no where. It started out small, maybe 2 or 3 bumps. Now just a few days later there's a lot more, all clumped in the same area. it did start itching a little bit last night but not too bad. For the most part I can't even notice it's there unless I look. It's gross, and I hate the fact that it's happening, but what else can I do other then deal with it?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 01-19-2009 03:29 PM

I'm trying to put myself in his shoes.

i explained everything to him, and how i think it happend and that if it is HPV there was nothing he could have done about it since he didn't know. I didn't blame him for doing anything.

Well if you said those words to me? And, I was proud of my cleanliness, faithfullness, I would think you are saying this is what " I think it is" and it is your fault if that's the case because it has come from you, however, it's not like you would have known you had it.

See why he is saying, " You should have told me after you find out what it is".. He is feeling like it is his fault and is frustrated because it's an "opinion" not based on facts.

I think had you have said "you have no idea" what it is could be an alergic reaction for instance, do you think he may have been a bit more supportive and stated, well let's see when you go to the Doctors .

Sometimes what you put into a person's head, is how they react.

CW

**GAD5764** · 01-20-2009 04:58 PM

HPV can be dormant in one partner for quite some time and show up in the other partner almost immediatly after exposure. I wouldn't wait any longer...go to the doctor. The quicker you know what it is, the quicker you can get it taken care of.

I got HPV from my ex boyfriend. When I told him, he blamed me for cheating on him when in actuality I was a virgin before I met him and he was the only one I had been with. After he calmed down, we were able to talk it out and figure out what we had to do. The treatment sucked but I have only had that one outbreak in almost 12 years. Get it taken care of ASAP and talk to your boyfriend. You have to be able to communicate.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 01-20-2009 07:45 PM

Jett... don't worry girl, in my eyes you did the mature thing to do which was talk to him about it. He chose not to reac in a mature way, and that may mean absolutely nothing other than that he doesnt know how to deal when times are tough. You are a woman, more than just a sexual being.....and if he loves you, he should be concerned, and supportive of anything you go through. I am keeping my fingers crossed for you!

**Jettpack** · 01-20-2009 08:55 PM

I ran into him at school today and he told me it just freaked him out and he didn't know how to deal with it if it ends up being warts... he seems to have calmed down and just asked me to call him when I get out of the doctor. I really hope it's something else, but I'm being realistic... I will find out tomorrow I suppose...

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