Am I a prude? - Page 3

**Hopeless Dork** · 02-20-2009, 12:05 AM

Edit to add I mean if the 3rd party is a pro, I am sure it would all be fine - but just trying to figure what emotions go into the member that is coming into the 3rd when they are faced with, okay dont kiss him and dont do this or that etc.. it just seems like maybe they would say forget it. What if the 3rd party needed eye contact, well obviously they wouldnt work for you guys... but I mean it must be really hard for couples to find a 3rd that is not a pro that is willing to come and help a couple with their fantasy fullfillment and be kind of treated like certain things of an intimate nature can not happen with them.

**golden_nemesis** · 02-20-2009, 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

Sometimes I think being the third party to a 3some would be the best because you get all the attention of both other parties and you get to leave that night and deal with none of the jealousy etc that may or may be.

But no offense to any ones rules that they put in a threesome (its their party!) but sometimes I think I'd feel like I had cooties being the 3rd member like.. Okay hes not allowed to touch you here or there and she can kiss you but dont look him in the eye etc.. while I understand it, I still think it could make the 3rd party feel a bit alien. I know I would.

Ok, so this is probably the most sordid part of my sexual history, but last May I was actually the 3rd member in an MFF threesome. I hadn't had sex for years, and was turning into a total basketcase. I developed a habit of cruising through craigslist casual encounters postings whenever I was horny. One day I stumbled across a post from an amazing-sounding woman who wanted to have a threesome with her boyfriend on his birthday. Before I really knew what I was doing, I had sent her an e-mail testing the waters. All the communication went through her. We talked on the phone every day for about a week, learning all about each other, getting comfortable with each other. The big day came, and I have to say, it was a pretty amazing experience. There were no "rules", other than that she wanted me to leave in the morning when she did so that I was not left alone with him. They were both incredibly generous and passionate. We didn't sleep much that night.

Anyway, I agree that if you are interested in a threesome, being the person not actually in a relationship is the way to go. I am now in a loving relationship, and there is no way in Heck I would want to share him with another woman. I think there was an added comfort level in the situation I got involved in because I actually traveled a couple hours to be with them, I was not local. So they never had to worry about seeing me again, LOL.

**alicat** · 02-26-2009, 01:21 AM

I don't share my man! He is mine, all mine! Any other woman comes near him I will scratch her eyes out!

Oh, excuse me, does that answer your question :-)

FlgirlinGa · 02-26-2009, 10:09 PM

I totally agree with alicat!

ritengo · 02-26-2009, 10:25 PM

If I had one, it would have to be MMF. I like men. I'm not sexually attracted to females in the least.

**Steph33** · 02-27-2009, 02:05 AM

I did FFM with a past ex, it didn't do it for me at all and his near obsession with wanting it all the time was part of why the relationship failed.

My current BF has no interest when it came up in casual conversation. He's of the "all equal" mindset so if a guy wants 2 girls, he should be able to handle 2 guys with the girl. Either way I know he'd break down mentally and emotionally just at the serious suggestion of a 3 way. He doesn't want anyone else and it would totally kill him to see me with anyone but him or want anyone but him.

For me he's enough alone to handle all the time and gets the orgasm "mission completed" like a patriot. He also gives me what I need more than just the sex; all the emotion, cuddle, talk, parts I need as much or more than getting off. Can't get that from a 1 timer (at least I can't).

It's fine for some but can really do damage in a lot of relationships in return for a quick session.

**2morrow** · 02-27-2009, 08:17 AM

I personally don't think I could do it. Basically you are giving your husband permission to commit adultery, and you are watching him do it ! That is too weird for me. Emotionally I couldn't handle it. I wouldn't want to watch my S/O have sex with another woman, and I would think that most men, wouldn't like to watch their lovely have sex with another man. Something morally wrong with that whole deal. Keeping it a fantasy, is the way to go. My opinion, that's all.....

kate95864 · 02-27-2009, 08:43 AM

well, as a woman, watching my man with another woman is a huge turn on for me. we have done this a few times, and yes, best with people who aren't really a part of our lives. i found myself turned on for weeks each time afterward, and he worshiped me for giving him this gift of "his" fantasy...which actually is as much my fantasy. i also loved being with her. i highly recommend doing what it takes to please your man. you'll reap huge benefits in the long run

**skipper** · 02-27-2009, 08:48 AM

Well, we are getting responses from one end of the spectrum to the other. It just goes to show there is a huge diversity in what we are all comfortable doing and what we think is acceptable. There are no right or wrong answers. Do what works for you.

kate95864 · 02-27-2009, 08:52 AM

yes, absolutely. doing what is best for yourself, and not judging others for their choices.

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02-20-2009, 12:05 AM	#21
Hopeless Dork Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: United States Posts: 1,238	Edit to add I mean if the 3rd party is a pro, I am sure it would all be fine - but just trying to figure what emotions go into the member that is coming into the 3rd when they are faced with, okay dont kiss him and dont do this or that etc.. it just seems like maybe they would say forget it. What if the 3rd party needed eye contact, well obviously they wouldnt work for you guys... but I mean it must be really hard for couples to find a 3rd that is not a pro that is willing to come and help a couple with their fantasy fullfillment and be kind of treated like certain things of an intimate nature can not happen with them.

02-26-2009, 01:21 AM	#23
alicat VIP Member Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 57	I don't share my man! He is mine, all mine! Any other woman comes near him I will scratch her eyes out! Oh, excuse me, does that answer your question :-)

02-26-2009, 10:09 PM	#24
FlgirlinGa Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 25	I totally agree with alicat!

02-26-2009, 10:25 PM	#25
ritengo Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 14	If I had one, it would have to be MMF. I like men. I'm not sexually attracted to females in the least.

02-27-2009, 02:05 AM	#26
Steph33 Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 283	I did FFM with a past ex, it didn't do it for me at all and his near obsession with wanting it all the time was part of why the relationship failed. My current BF has no interest when it came up in casual conversation. He's of the "all equal" mindset so if a guy wants 2 girls, he should be able to handle 2 guys with the girl. Either way I know he'd break down mentally and emotionally just at the serious suggestion of a 3 way. He doesn't want anyone else and it would totally kill him to see me with anyone but him or want anyone but him. For me he's enough alone to handle all the time and gets the orgasm "mission completed" like a patriot. He also gives me what I need more than just the sex; all the emotion, cuddle, talk, parts I need as much or more than getting off. Can't get that from a 1 timer (at least I can't). It's fine for some but can really do damage in a lot of relationships in return for a quick session.

02-27-2009, 08:17 AM	#27
2morrow VIP Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Canada Posts: 70	I personally don't think I could do it. Basically you are giving your husband permission to commit adultery, and you are watching him do it ! That is too weird for me. Emotionally I couldn't handle it. I wouldn't want to watch my S/O have sex with another woman, and I would think that most men, wouldn't like to watch their lovely have sex with another man. Something morally wrong with that whole deal. Keeping it a fantasy, is the way to go. My opinion, that's all.....

02-27-2009, 08:43 AM	#28
kate95864 Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 6	well, as a woman, watching my man with another woman is a huge turn on for me. we have done this a few times, and yes, best with people who aren't really a part of our lives. i found myself turned on for weeks each time afterward, and he worshiped me for giving him this gift of "his" fantasy...which actually is as much my fantasy. i also loved being with her. i highly recommend doing what it takes to please your man. you'll reap huge benefits in the long run

02-27-2009, 08:48 AM	#29
skipper Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Pensacola Posts: 110	Well, we are getting responses from one end of the spectrum to the other. It just goes to show there is a huge diversity in what we are all comfortable doing and what we think is acceptable. There are no right or wrong answers. Do what works for you.

02-27-2009, 08:52 AM	#30
kate95864 Junior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 6	yes, absolutely. doing what is best for yourself, and not judging others for their choices.