yea, nice subject, but that's it in a nutshell
Me and my husband have been married for a year and we're both virgins.

We've tried a lot, but everytime I have incredible pain. I see people keep saying "use lubricants" but we have and I don't think that's the problem.

Whenver he enters there is just an intense amount of pressure.

If you have any suggestions, I'd love to hear them.

We just got health insurance and I plan on seeing a gyno, but I am just so nervous.
I keep thinking they are just going to tell me to "try harder" or to use dilators or something to widen my vagina...i just don't want to do that.

Hi,
I am a newly wed as well but by no means a virgin. I was molested as a child so I had to go through this without any help. I hope what I say may help some. I would think that mabey your muscles are just very tight and you need to be eased into things and just taking it really slow. Try a warm/hot bath to relax your muscles and possibly a small vibrator to tease your vagina and slowly insert it (using lube) Little by little until you begin to loosen up. This is what I do because I have a bad habbit of re-tightening after I have had sex once and go to do it again in the same day. It hurts me too and this works wonders for me. Just keep the vibrator very small and mabey get 1-2 sizes larger to ease yourself into something more your husbands size. It's better than some of the alternatives and it can be fun and very stimulating. Dont forget to pay attention to the clit as well. I hope this helps and good luck and blessed be.

I agree that it's just a combination of making sure you are well worked up and taking it slow and easy. My first time was extremely painful, lots of pressure, and it took several tries. It's not easy for most women so you are no exception to the rule. You have to be brave and push through the pain. Their is tissue in their that has to be torn (hymen) and your muscles have to be stretched out. After the first couple of times of full penetration, the pain goes away and it's all pleasure. As WillowRaven said, try starting with smaller vibrators. Maybe slowly work up a size each time. It's also important that you do that often. As time passes, the vagina shrinks back up and you have to start all over again.

Some women have very thick hymens.
A gynie will cut it under a local anesthesia
and sex will be possible.

If you get so afraid you tighten up,
then you're going to have to figure
out how to relax...

You don't need to do anything except that you have to be fully turned on and absolutly wet in order for the /penis to enter the vagina.That has been my experience.It doesn't matter if the is big or small as long as you are completely turned on.If after all that,well yeah you should see a gyno it could be more than that.

There are women with extremely thick hymens,
which are surgically removed. It's one of those
topics no one talks about, but should be on the
agenda.

It can be a physical problem which requires
surgery.