Thread: never orgasmed

Hey all, I'm looking for tips for reaching a first orgasm (I don't think I'm lacking anything obvious like mood, foreplay, lube, etc). Here's the situation:

I'm 19 and had never really done anything sexual until a couple months ago with a very sweet (um, and relatively experienced) BF whom I'm totally comfortable with. He's tried a great deal of fingering/oral and also encouraged me to get a vibrator and start masturbating. Sometimes I get to what I think is the plateau phase but I either stay there or it just kind of dies away. Other times the clit feels too intense and I have to stop. Recently we had sex for the first time and have tried a couple different positions so far (although I haven't been on top yet? I hear that's effective). At one point I felt something different that I think was my G-spot, but nothing happened even though we went at it for a good 20 minutes.

So, I don't know what else to try. Ideas? Did you have a first orgasm while doing something unexpected, maybe?

Try on top. You can control what feels good and relax. That is about the only way I can cum lately. You are lucky that your BF gives you oral and fingering. Unfortunately my husband of 19 years has never done that so I have had to do what I can to orgasm and being on the top works for me without foreplay. Good Luck and Enjoy!!

Relaxation..

I give my girl alot off foreplay, and she has an orgasm pretty much everytime.. I've noticed that if she has alot of tention and is tensing, she wont or finds it alot harder to get an orgasim..

But once she lets go and totally relaxes, she nearly explodes

So just try to chill out and relax and have fun, ease your muscles and maybe youll get your gift.

Some girls are harder to orgasim than others but, I'm sure one way or another youll get one.

Also if your boyfriend is expierenced, and maybe he does this anyway but, get him to rub your clit, instead off just fingering you in and out. I remember the first time I started to rub my GF's clit instead off just constant fingering.. Her legs where like jelly afterwards

Originally Posted by jasminetea

Other times the clit feels too intense and I have to stop.

DONT stop carry on then you will orgasm

Foreplay is what you need a lot of it.

You have to be WET before you even think about penetration.

These days there is way too much emphasise put on penetrating try going out and having fun with each other, then coming home and having a lovely meal together or going out and having a romantic dinner with flirting.

When you get home keep teasing each other then cuddle each other followed by caressing then kissing on the mouth but do it with finesse, not just a quick hard pash that is uncomfortable or horrible, put some passion into it.

Learn to kiss properly as a form of foreplay, followed by cuddling and kissing around the neck your breasts, etc.

Make sure he caresses your body for at least 30 minutes, at the very least, nothing saying he can't caress your body for much longer or more who knows you might even have an orgasm.

Your simply not getting enough foreplay to get you wet, if your not wet don't bother allowing him inside you.

I don't use a vibrator--it's too intense for me. Just relax, maybe try with your fingers, and eventually, you'll get it!

I experienced my first orgasm through masturbation. Many of the women I talk to have experienced their first orgasm through masturbation as well. I, personally, think that if you don't stop and take the time to learn your body and what pleases you that you are putting a heck of a job on your partner that could leave you both unsatisfied.

The vibrator is a really good idea, but just rubbing something on your body isn't quite enough. You need to make sure to get your mind into the frame of being turned on, arroused... whatever thoughts or visual stimulation you need to feel that way, use them.. and let yourself be excited...THEN.. use that or your fingers, concentrating on your outer parts first.

Don't focus on your orgasm, focus on the pleasure, focus on trying to just enjoy the sensations and how good they feel to you. As you get more into it, those feelings will get better... and better... and better... and just when you hit a sensation that feels so good you wish it would last forever... you orgasm.

For me the orgasm is nowhere near as much pleasure as those few seconds just before it... where your body is feeling the most pleasure it will feel.

Masturbate. And don't stop until you orgasm.

Hypnosis can do this for you as well. I've helped many reach orgasm through hypnotic procedures for a variety of reasons.

OG