Thread: Making your man happy

For generations we've had this women should just "give in" to men's "urges" stuff going on. It created an unlovely situation of unresponsive women apparently just laying there like dolls while their husband "satisfied" himself.

Then someone let the cat out of the bag and women were told they should enjoy it too. But most had no clue how, so we were told we should fake it so the man would feel better about it and maybe if we were lucky, while faking it the real thing would happen (seriously, there were articles like this in the early 70s women's mags)

Now we are supposed to have turned into sexual dynamos. Some of us have achieved that and are highly orgasmic, only to find that the men are intimidated, can't keep up and aren't willing to even try to meet our needs on an even occasional basis. Rather like the bully who always wants to fight - until someone laughingly says alright, I'll take you on. Then they hear mother calling and have to go.

In some cases it seems to be performance fear, in some a control issue. What it almost never seems to be with men, is something you can sit down and talk about reasonably and get a rational response or some sort of compromise. That little head doesn't just cause them to act stupid sometimes, it causes most of them to shut down if they can't lead with it. The idea that men would love a woman who initiates sex, who is always ready, willing and interested, seems to be true only in their fantasies because they want a women who is always turned on and sexually aggressive - when They want it. Any other time they want her to turn it off and forget it.

At 50 plus, I've dealt with years of this with a number of men. I love sex, without being demanding, I'll do whatever I can to get it going and keep it going. I never met One, who would reciprocate for more than a few months. Once it really sinks in that I'm not just trying to rope him in with sex and that I really want it pretty much all the time, they cool down. Since we have nothing in our history comparable to the old sexual grin and bear it that women did for generations for men, they have no sense that this is something they need to work on.