im so confused bout things help me plz

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-03-2009 12:30 AM

Well, my guess is, if he is "scared" and "shy" about you having an orgasm, he's not educted.

As such, it certainly can be that he may think that "orgasms" mean more chances of you getting pregnant. Truth is, any sex can lead you to being pregnant.

I guess your suggesting perhaps he doesn't wear a Condom? That would solve that fear if that's his only fear.. as well as protecting you both...

If it doesn't solve it, when suggested, then maybe he's just scared or is he prudish? What nationality is he? Is he also 16? Have you thought about seeing a Doctor for Birth Control?

CW

**Antonia** · 11-03-2009 12:55 AM

Masturbation is the most intimate sexual act a woman can do. It is very healthy to masturbate. Various studies have shown that women who do not masturbate at a young age (during teens) have more problems attaining orgasms when they grow up. Masturbation (which is frequently accompanied by touching areas of the body other than your pubic area) helps a young woman (or girl) to discover her body, and to know and appreciate how her body reacts to a touch. The face, the arm, the ears, the neck, the nape, the teats, the belly, the inner thighs, the mons, the vagina, all react to a touch, with varying degrees of stimuli. It is important at your age to have your hand and fingers wander to these areas. The more you touch yourself and receive the stimulation caused by the touch, the more sexually confident you become because the more you know your body.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-03-2009 01:02 AM

For further posters, this thread is not about masterbation.. It's about the poster having lost her virginity recently to her boyfriend and feeling close to orgasm simply through intercourse only and wanting him to get her there, but him either scared or shy of doing so... She's posed questions such as, maybe he thinks she will get pregnant more so if she orgasms? Or, perhaps he's un-eductated over it's okay and great for a female to orgasm.

Please reply in this regard.

CW

**Amber_1992** · 11-03-2009 01:19 AM

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

Well, my guess is, if he is "scared" and "shy" about you having an orgasm, he's not educted.

As such, it certainly can be that he may think that "orgasms" mean more chances of you getting pregnant. Truth is, any sex can lead you to being pregnant.

I guess your suggesting perhaps he doesn't wear a Condom? That would solve that fear if that's his only fear.. as well as protecting you both...

If it doesn't solve it, when suggested, then maybe he's just scared or is he prudish? What nationality is he? Is he also 16? Have you thought about seeing a Doctor for Birth Control?

CW

the uneducation makes sense..i hope he gets over himself and can be comfortale enough to please himself and me..

he doesnt wear a condom..there uncomfortable and theres no feeling.. he cnt even get off by me using my hands on him or masterbating..his nationality is a mix i know theres african american mexican and dutch i believe im not sure actualy...and i am currently on the depo shot for birth control.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-03-2009 01:27 AM

Mmmm.... "haha over getting over himself"

Well you can't get pregnant, you are taking precautions and therefore, it's not that unless he doesn't realise that depo shot is birth control?

I think he's got a fear... not realising that if he is capable of giving you an orgasm, that's ok.. I am also tending to think your very sexual and he's not... To him it's sex, to you, it's exciting and you want to explore, make love, not have sex.

If he can't get off by masterbating on his own.. He's new at all this sweet, just like you but shocked that you can be so ready and open about it all and he's really at the very beginning of it all.

Just do it slower, hold him and kiss him more and tell him you love him, let him feel safe and comfortable and basically, you have to be the leader I think.

PS: What did you mean at the beginning by "unfortunately, I lost my virginity?"...

CW

**Amber_1992** · 11-03-2009 01:49 AM

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

Mmmm.... "haha over getting over himself"

Well you can't get pregnant, you are taking precautions and therefore, it's not that unless he doesn't realise that depo shot is birth control?

I think he's got a fear... not realising that if he is capable of giving you an orgasm, that's ok.. I am also tending to think your very sexual and he's not... To him it's sex, to you, it's exciting and you want to explore, make love, not have sex.

If he can't get off by masterbating on his own.. He's new at all this sweet, just like you but shocked that you can be so ready and open about it all and he's really at the very beginning of it all.

Just do it slower, hold him and kiss him more and tell him you love him, let him feel safe and comfortable and basically, you have to be the leader I think.

PS: What did you mean at the beginning by "unfortunately, I lost my virginity?"...

CW

he knows what it is but he thinks it could fail hes next to me putng his two sense lol...he wanted a baby for a while and i jst wasnt ready..im so open about it beause we tell each other everything and i believe were really in love...am i just getting ahead of him?

i said unfortunately because lt of people look down on sex at such a young age and im not comfortable with talking to my mom her and i arnt the best friends we shuld be..we dnt get along wat so ever.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-03-2009 01:55 AM

Lol..

Well sweet, you've answered your own question. It's all to do with you getting pregnant because you have shared that you were open to it and now he's thinking (NOOOOOO) not yet and is scared, just in-case it doesn't work and you get pregnant that's all it is.

Did you know? A woman is 4 years older than a man mentally? That's a fact. Mind you they don't grow up ever, at 40 they are still kids and at 50 they want boats or motorbikes to relive...

Well, we can't chose our parents but at least at 16, you have your head screwed on and went about to obtain birth control good for you....

CW

**Amber_1992** · 11-03-2009 02:15 AM

thank you for your help...i hope we can be closer and he can open up to me and be comfortable..

really? i never thot of it being a mental opinion in age?

yeah before we decided to make love we talked about wht we wanted and wat we were going to do to stay safe..we were both virgins but still before we got completely checked and then i gt the shot then we decided we loved each other and it was right and we made love..it hurt rlly bad and i bled

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 11-03-2009 02:27 AM

Your welcome

Your both young, what is important is that you talk and can converse.

Yep, it's a factual, 4yrs

Men are different than women.. He will open up more, he will feel more, I know you want more domination but you may have to give first, (slowly) and ease him into it to have the sexual relationship you want.

Your both young, you need to support him..

Whilst I changed the course of this thread from masterbation, it was done to ensure that people answer what you need now... (I am in Australia) most are sleeping

But, you know, if your sexual as you are, and have felt orgasms almost coming to a peek, don't disregard masterbating.. It is important to have no inhibitions and experimenting by yourself is the only way you can work out what you like and how you like it to guide your man.

It's not dirty at all.... I do it... you don't have to use a toy... just think about sharing you with you to find.

x

CW

**broseph** · 11-03-2009 08:04 PM

You do not get along, yet he wants to have a baby? I would be cautious. You are 16. You don't want to become pregnant this early in life.

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