Greenline

Ok so here is a scenario that may cause a little bit of disagreement & discussion. Here's the deal......

About a year ago, I had bought my girlfriend a pair of black leather boots. The boots were literally bought for her as a gift from me because I thought she would look hot in them, and I wanted to see her in them. In effect, the boots were more like a piece of lingerie, as the purpose was to turn me on--it was not because I thought they were functional and would go well with her work clothes. While granted, they have more everyday function than a piece of lingerie, she knew the reason why I wanted to see her in them (and why I was buying them for her).

Black leather boots were not previously a part of her normal attire, nor did she formerly express interest in wearing boots of the sort before all this. However, she was more than happy to accept the gift and entertain my wishes. So we shopped for a few months at a number of stores until we finally found the perfect pair. She wore them to work once or twice, and finally wore them out on a date we went on.

Unfortunately, her and I broke up soon after before she was able to really wear them for me any more than that one date or two. So for all purposes, they were pretty much unused. The reason for our breakup is not the point nor any influence on the question at hand, so don't worry about that. What I am wondering is whether or not it is in poor taste for her to continue wearing the boots I had purchased for her as a gift to wear for me?

[Please refrain from telling me to stop worrying about her or the boots or any of that. I'm really not that stressed or obsessed about it. The question only came to mind because as the weather has gotten cold, I am now seeing those type of boots coming back out. I have no clue whether or not she is really wearing them or even still owns them for that matter. I am just curious to know what your opinion is regarding the principle of it all. Is it poor taste or not?]

Texasred

You gave her a gift, not a diamond engagement ring.
End of story.

Antonia

Black clothing, in general, is sexy. Wearing black leather boots, with a relatively short black dress, and wearing black Wolford or Agent Provocateur stay-ups makes my man lustfully crazy.

CHANDLERS WISH

I understand where you are coming from but if you put a thought pattern into her mind? And, she agreed with that thought? Then they will come into play with another man, sorry... It's all about learning and finding ones self and people in our lives are teachers so yes, your shoes may end up on another man's head as things ocur.

Your asking about her thoughts, not another mans and this is my take on it.

CW

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Steph33

I have a dozen pairs, from above ankle to thigh high. ALL picked by him.

He drools like an infant when I wear them, with nothing else at home or with an outfit in public.

And the higher the heels, the faster he pants

Greenline

Now I hesitate to reply to my own thread here, cause I want to avoid influencing another person's decision. However, I feel the need to clarify my perspective nonetheless.

I obviously think it would be poor taste if the situation literally were about a piece of lingerie. It seems absurd to think of a situation where a guy would buy a piece of lingerie for his significant other, and tell her to wear it when she has sex with the next few guys she dates and not for himself. Why would I spend my money for those results? Why would her and I spend our time shopping together for months to pick out the boots if in the end someone else was getting to enjoy the gift, the benefits of seeing them on her?

My issue with it all (and belief that it would be poor taste to continue wearing the boots) is because we are talking about her wearing THE SAME boots that I purchased for her for the purposes of turning ME on. I have no problem with her wearing 1000 pairs of other black boots for 1000 other guys even for the sole purposes of turning them on. Just not with those boots I purchasd.

Would your answer change if it were lingerie instead of boots? If not, that's fine. I want to know whatever you really think. I just wanted to make sure I clarified the key points to my perspective in case they were lost in the whole explanation.

Hopeless Dork

If it were lingerie, boots, perfume... my answer would be the same. No its not in poor taste for her to use them despite the fact you've broken up. I can understand feeling slighted that you never got to use them as intended during the purchase, and to think of her still rolling around town in an item you paid for might make you upset.... a gift is a gift.

If a guy pays to get his gfs hair and nails done... because sexy hair and nails turn him on... when they break up should she shave her head and saw off her nails? I don't think so.

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WildChild

A gift is just that a gift - you gave them to her and they are hers to do with as she pleases. They are no longer any of your business.

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GlitterAndStuds

I don't think it's in poor taste, especially since it's not like everyone who sees her will know that an ex boyfriend gave them to her.

If it was me then I would certainly continue to wear them if I liked them, otherwise it's a waste of a perfectly good pair of boots. Wearing them to bed with a different guy would probably feel awkward so no, I wouldn't do that. Maybe she won't either. But to answer the direct question, I think it's okay.

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KMonte85

Despite the intent, the boots were a gift for her. Once they are her gift, they are hers to do with whatever she likes. Yes, it sucks you didn't get much gratification from them, but that's life.

The fact that you paid for a gift for your intimate purposes is irrelevant, even if you do feel (understandably) slighted. They are hers. period.

If you had paid for her breast implants because big b00bs are your thing, would you have asked that she gets them removed before another mans gets to benefit from your investment?

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