Thread: help!!!! argh!!!

Ok.. first of all, none of this is "lame". I personally think that we all as women know when we're ready to have sex, and that doesn't come at the same age for all of us. But it seems as if women, or should I say girls are assuming they are ready to lose their virginity at a younger age just so they can get it over with and start enjoying it. Honestly, when you're 15 or 16 you're still a teenager, and you're still young. You are not legal, you aren't adults, and you're not legally responsible for your own actions. There is still SO MUCH to learn, and I just think that being 15 or 16 and sleeping with numbers of people is extremely irresponsible. If you think you're ready, do it with your long term boyfriend, someone you really care about. Otherwise people will talk, and you will start building this reputation for yourself of being a ***** if you sleep around. Save that until you're ready to handle the responsibility. There are so many more complications to relationships with sex when you're an adult. I don't think it should be practiced at a younger age.

wow i'm kinda surprised by all these people saying not to have sex. if you truly believe you're ready and it feels right and you love your boyfriend and he loves you i say go for it! it's a wonderful experience and a beautiful expression of the love between two people.
as for the pain, i would suggest that you relax yourself. if you're too tense your vaginal muscles will contract and that could cause more pain. also, maybe a personal lubricant would help... but make sure it's for sexual use and compatible with condoms... we don't want a bun in the oven at 16!
hope that helps and good luck

Understanding consequences is a very important aspect.
What happens if, at sixteen, you ratchet up what is just
a minor infatuation to an intimate one?

Now, I've posted it before, so have others.
The fact that one can not obliterate is that for
many boys screwing a lot of girls is their rite
of passage.

They screw, they chat, the next guy comes for his
piece, and everyone knows everything.

There was a famous story of a young woman who
decided to have sex with a particular man. And she
went to where he was and saw him with another
girl.

This guy had given her all the 'love' lines and she
was madly in love with him and believed everything
he had said.

He had girls like her lined up all over the place, and
hedged his bets, because he was going to have
sex that night with someone...

When she saw him with the other girl, all happy and
feely the same way he was with her, she went home.

Now she was lucky, because the next day the only
people who didn't know what happened between he
and the other girl were dead.

She, however, played cool as if she always knew he
was handing her lines.

I just wanted to share my story with you, maybe it will give you some comfort (yes, I believe in waiting for sex, but I enough people have offered the good reasons for that that I'm not going to repeat them):

The first time I, well, TRIED to have sex was my wedding night, and I remember being so afraid. Yeah, it hurt when we tried, and we ultimately had to give up that evening--succeeded on our second try the next night. The thing is, on the surface this story sounds so awful: I mean, there's pain involved, and embarassment. But I remember these first few nights on our honeymoon wonderfully, because of how my husband treated me. I cannot say enough how glad I am that I waited for such a special person, and waited till we were as close and committed as we were, because it made all the difference in the world. He was so gentle, and so understanding, and even on that first night, I just remember falling asleep in his arms.

I love your story, Tabby.
It reveals something 'sexually liberated'
women will never experience.

If there is doubt...Take your time. No one should be rushed into this.

Losing your virginity isn't just an act of passion or pleasure it is like a first kiss but more important because once you do it you can't have another.

There is only one first.

The emotional connection and love you give out that one moment will be ingrained in your memory. Read each posting. Everyone remembers their first.

It is almost like you took out your heart and gave it to that one person. Sounds gruesome, but...it does feel like that. If you truly feel that you can literally pull your heart out for this guy and not have regrets then =) it is your decision to make.

1. When you're masturbating (or doing any other kind of solo-sexual exercise) please DO NOT use produce. Use a specifically designed sex toy. A goodly chunk of all emergency room visits are the result of inappropriate encounters with foreign objects. Get an older friend to go to the toy store (or buy online with your debit card), safety first.

2. Whether its 1st, 2nd, 3rd, or all the way do not feel pressured by your boyfriend du jour. You'll know when your ready to perform oral or 'get laid' for your own self. Don't do it for your relationship, don't do it for him, do it for you.

3. If you can't talk to your parents its a good indication that you aren't as mature or self reliant enough to progress from childhood to womanhood yet IMHO.

4. As for the issue of a medically overachieving hymen I will cast my vote with "see a doctor". Barring that the hymen is a fleshy membrane. If by chance you MUST remove it quickly, a sterile slim blade will slice through it in half a second. Once the guide-hole is open, the rest will follow with some intercourse. Expect pain and bloody discharge.

5. Man I'm lucky I'm a guy. For us virginity is a taint to rid ourselves of as soon as we're old enough to understand what it is (not unlike lice). Our only virginity fear is "please let me last more than three thrusts".

Try not posting in a thread a year old,

*grumbles to himself*