No matter how hard I try, I can't orgasm during intercourse!

**asiangrace86** · 11-06-2009, 10:59 PM

I have yet to experience an orgasm during intercourse. Everything about my boyfriend turns me on so I'm confused on why I can't get turned on enough to orgasm? The only way I can achieve an orgasm is if I manipulate myself. It's so frustrating. I've tried everything. Relaxing, breathing techniques, different positions, lubes...etc.

Is this normal??? Do orgasms during intercourse feel different than orgasms from masturbation??

Are there any "medications" I can take to enhance or achieve an orgasm?

**WildChild** · 11-06-2009, 11:33 PM

A lot of women don't orgasm with intercourse, I think they probably can but trying too hard won't do the job. We've talk extensively about this here, right now I'm about to keel over from some allergy fatigue. Why not do a site search and see what you find? Lana may have some good input on this - she got there. I've pretty much always been fully orgasmic with intercourse so all I can talk about what I do and things I've read that sound like they should get you there. See what you find - and we can expand on this later?

**nightqueen** · 11-07-2009, 06:24 AM

Many women can't through intercourse. It's okay. Why don't you let him manipulate you?? Have fun!

**baja** · 11-07-2009, 07:18 AM

Honestly, in my experience, it is not as black & white as some here make it sound. I've known women who have real trouble in this area and typically find that going slow, working different angles, being very patient, the build-up and watching for the right cues is key. Oh, and did I say be very patient?

Of course, this assumes that she can fully relax, let her mind go and not pressure herself on making it happen.

I prefer to believe virtually all women can have one, but it is a matter of dialing up the right combination. Once it happens more often, I've noticed she can figure out some of the other little things that help make it happen even more frequently... and so on...

**LanaBear** · 11-07-2009, 02:32 PM

Try not to over think it... If it is constantly in the back of your head, worrying about trying to achieve one, it'll never happen.

Can he get you there with his hand/fingers? Have you had a g-spot orgasm with him or yourself?

11-06-2009, 10:59 PM	#1
asiangrace86 VIP Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Kansas City, Mo Posts: 31	No matter how hard I try, I can't orgasm during intercourse! I have yet to experience an orgasm during intercourse. Everything about my boyfriend turns me on so I'm confused on why I can't get turned on enough to orgasm? The only way I can achieve an orgasm is if I manipulate myself. It's so frustrating. I've tried everything. Relaxing, breathing techniques, different positions, lubes...etc. Is this normal??? Do orgasms during intercourse feel different than orgasms from masturbation?? Are there any "medications" I can take to enhance or achieve an orgasm?

11-06-2009, 11:33 PM	#2
WildChild Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Western USA Posts: 6,223 Blog Entries: 5	A lot of women don't orgasm with intercourse, I think they probably can but trying too hard won't do the job. We've talk extensively about this here, right now I'm about to keel over from some allergy fatigue. Why not do a site search and see what you find? Lana may have some good input on this - she got there. I've pretty much always been fully orgasmic with intercourse so all I can talk about what I do and things I've read that sound like they should get you there. See what you find - and we can expand on this later? __________________ We can only learn to love by loving. Iris Mudoch, British writer

11-07-2009, 02:32 PM	#5
LanaBear Gold Contributor 500+ Posts Moon Lander Champion! Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: A cozy little cottage on the moon. :-) Posts: 1,639 Blog Entries: 5	Try not to over think it... If it is constantly in the back of your head, worrying about trying to achieve one, it'll never happen. Can he get you there with his hand/fingers? Have you had a g-spot orgasm with him or yourself? __________________ Sometimes life isn't the party we hoped for, but since we're here, we might as well DANCE!

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11-07-2009, 06:24 AM	#3
nightqueen Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 184	Many women can't through intercourse. It's okay. Why don't you let him manipulate you?? Have fun!

11-07-2009, 07:18 AM	#4
baja VIP Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Atlanta Posts: 63	Honestly, in my experience, it is not as black & white as some here make it sound. I've known women who have real trouble in this area and typically find that going slow, working different angles, being very patient, the build-up and watching for the right cues is key. Oh, and did I say be very patient? Of course, this assumes that she can fully relax, let her mind go and not pressure herself on making it happen. I prefer to believe virtually all women can have one, but it is a matter of dialing up the right combination. Once it happens more often, I've noticed she can figure out some of the other little things that help make it happen even more frequently... and so on...