Thread: Wife's lack of sex drive

My wife informed me that she does not desire sex and does not know why.
We have had sex twice in 16 months and I can't take it.
We have 3 kids and have been married for 8 years and I am wondering if this is a possible medical condition or is it ME that she does not desire.
Any similar cases? and is there any hope? Thank you.

I'm the same way at times, but never that long. Iknow that it's so hard to focus on pleasing your partner when you have 3 kids in the house. Why not try some excitement, Plan a get away, don't tell her and see if that works. If not maybe you need to see a doc!, But understand it's so hard to work,deal with kids and all the other stuff. Trust me sometimes the last thing you think of is SEX at the end of the day.

Go shopping and get some products that have L-Argenine in it for her, or some libido enhancement products. And then have her see her doctor in the mean time so that they can check her hormone levels.

Thanks for your replies.
I understand being tired at the end of the day, but that gets old after 6 months.
I am completely frustrated and am considering ending the so-so mariage if this doesn't change.
Are there any support groups for the sexually frustrated? I mean really, I get so depressed night after night of not gettting it.

i know what you mean, my husband is the same way. holidays come and go- days go by nothing! we have 5 kids i stay home he works regular hours,i go to bed early he stays up late. when he wants sex sometimes i dont want to just because of all the times he makes me wait. and then when we do have sex it's over so fast why even do it in the first place! im just as frustrated and yes it is depressing. i love him but i also like sex!by the way we have been married almost 14 years.

Wife's lack of sex drive

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My wife informed me that she does not desire sex and does not know why.
We have had sex twice in 16 months and I can't take it.
We have 3 kids and have been married for 8 years and I am wondering if this is a possible medical condition or is it ME that she does not desire.
Any similar cases? and is there any hope? Thank you.


If that ever happend with me and my bf I would go nuts and inform him that I am going to rape him.


Err personally if shes old she could be having menopause....

Id say, perhaps yuor not.... quite the looker you once were?

Try looking sexy to spark her interest.


or maybe its skill that is lacking?


Maybe shes getting bored of routine, I had that problem a while back I just got bored...


Instead of going for sex, go down on her (eat her out) (lick her clit) if you are unaware of what I meant, it may spark her interest.

Is your wife taking any prescriptions-birth control pill or anything? Sometimes drugs have a side effect of lowering your libido. I've found that with birth control pills-I noticed a huge difference so I quickly went off of them. I've heard of other medications that take away your sex drive also. Get flirty with your wife-tease her every once in a while with little sexual inuendos, and just kind of beat around the bush to try to get her interested, and to create a spark-but don't say anything to make her feel pressured. Tell her how hot she looks, or give her lots of compliments so she'll feel good about herself and confident when it's bedtime. Try to do extra things for her-go out of your way to help out with the kids, etc. and then maybe she'll want to return the favor and do something nice for you! (in the bedroom hopefully) Don't make it obvious though like you're kissing up to her, just randomly do things. I know that works with me and my husband-we've been married 10 years, and when he's gone the extra mile to help me and when he's in a good mood, then I'm in a good mood and I have a stronger desire to make him happy in any way I can! Good luck!!

Originally Posted by stessed out

i know what you mean, my husband is the same way. holidays come and go- days go by nothing! we have 5 kids i stay home he works regular hours,i go to bed early he stays up late. when he wants sex sometimes i dont want to just because of all the times he makes me wait. and then when we do have sex it's over so fast why even do it in the first place! im just as frustrated and yes it is depressing. i love him but i also like sex!by the way we have been married almost 14 years.

I would suggest make his mood, by wearing Lingerie. create a sex environment share what you feel most of the times men dedicate them selves for work too much that they even forget there needs. give him a massage INSHALLAH you will success on this. wish you good luck. i had the same issue with my husband but now its going too perfect

Originally Posted by kippy99

Thanks for your replies.
I understand being tired at the end of the day, but that gets old after 6 months.
I am completely frustrated and am considering ending the so-so mariage if this doesn't change.
Are there any support groups for the sexually frustrated? I mean really, I get so depressed night after night of not gettting it.

well i will suggest you to share tell him what you feel may be there is some problems in him.
May be you can help me i love to have sex infact every one but when ever i have it with my wife i never feel satisfied as she enjoys but she want me to do everything, what ever i do its okay but she never do to warm me up i can see her satisfaction but i m not. this forces me to stop i have alot of desires to do but with this type of reply i feel bored. i feel i am just excersing. i told her many time to play with me also but she never. how can i make this relation more exicting.

I'm running into this same situation. however, I am not a bad looking guy, and I feel our sex is up to par! We have 4 kids, and time is nearly impossible....she works, I work, and here lately she's just started working out and I run. We're both in decent shape, however she is a little heavier than she wants to be...(of which I think she looks great anyway)....

I was frustrated at first, as she stated the same thing as above...."I could care less if I ever had sex again"...but after warming up she gets into it. I'm very careful about doing all the warming up things, during foreplay, making sure she "gets her orgasm" during or after, and I help out more around the house. It's a good man that will wash cloths, wash dishes, or whatever need's attention around home, just helping out. They women appreciate it and we do get "rewarded"!

At first it was a major concern of mine...then as time has rolled on, I'm learning to understand her needs more and more (amazing thing I can tell ya, understanding a women in the first place lol). Pressure from work, plus 4 kids, plus house work, plus plus....equals NO time for dad!
get off your ***, help out more, and the sex will be there....maybe not as much as it was at the first part of the marriage, but I can tell ya this, Mine is there, and better than the first 10 years
good luck!
C Harper