Thread: Is she a control freak?

Ugh! I would hate being told when sex was scheduled, and being told that I had to do it on a certian day b/c my period was coming up. I think you sound controlling.

The whole 'since we did it on such and such and should be good for a while' is an indicator, in my opinion.. that she's seeing it more as a job than a shared sexual pleasure. Like if she is doing it simply to please you, its more likely she will give an estimate of what she feels is a sufficient compromise and say things like 'okay we did it yesterday, we're good right?'. Usually the person that wants more sex in the relationship, is going to do things like you're doing - planning ahead, seeing times when she wont and trying to make up for it ahead of time where as the person that wants less is going to try to do the bare minimum to make you happy.

Its a hurtful feeling when you feel like the one you love is making being with you into a job/chore that they tick off like 'there, that'll shut em' up for at least 2 days'. I guess the root of the issue would be that maybe she isn't enjoying the sex for some reason and this very likely has little to do with you if you are sure you are focusing on her and her pleasure.

I've known plenty of women that despise sex, even if they orgasm from it. They see it as just something thats going to make them sweaty and need a shower and not worth all the hassle and various other reasons they put it on back burner such as a prime one, lack of drive, or lack of ability to become aroused during the act or unable to obtain orgasm etc.

Some relationship experts advise to 'schedule sex'... but i think once you get to the point where each team is keeping a tally of not enough or 'thats enough'... its not great for intimacy. To me, sex should be about the organic vibe and desire in that moment. I think plotting for sunday sex is just as unfair to yourself and her as her plotting no sunday sex... as you set an expectation that she and or you will be in the mood on that day, and well... you might not, she might not.

Its so much better to just be close to each other every day and if the vibe hits you go for it then and there, whether you did it yesterday or last week... when someone says we will do it on thursday at lunch, thats assuming either partner will even be in the mood thursday at lunch... a lot an happen to damper things before then.. so keeping a more spontanious mind about it... both of you - could help a lot.

Thread was accidentally brought up by spam - closing.