im wondering....

**deepblue** · 01-11-2010 09:26 PM

hi, my bf and i stayed together for 9 month. he said he love me so much But i knew that he always talk to other women, As he told me it just for sex!! ... Love is just only me. He is 49 years old, he said he is going soon then now as he can do is have sex with a young women, Im 24 yrs. He always tell me that for other women just SEX.... 'Love just you and me'.... Now he going to ask one girl who he said is his student (he payed her for education for long before he know me)
He said he going to see her soon, and i asked him that i wanna go to but he said No becoz its not good for my brain, i gonna think to much, he said. Well i really want to know what gonna happen there,,, he said just talk... and he said he wont do anyth behind my back.....So how should i do or can i trust him?????

**StillLearnin** · 01-12-2010 06:01 AM

Well, I hate to be blunt, but what do you think is going to happen there?
Men that have young girlfriends are mainly (or more than likely only) in it for the sex. The older a man gets, the more he wants to play and have less commitments (generally speaking for single middle aged men).
Believe me, it is most every middle aged man's fantasy to have a young twenty something girlfriend. A young woman like you makes us feel young again. In fact, "mid-life crisis" is loosely defined as "starting over." Starting over usually means finding somebody that is sexually compatible, and why not make it a hot, young sexually compatible girlfriend?

**WildChild** · 01-12-2010 06:08 AM

Darlin if you are looking for the real thing, long term, he's not it. At least not unless he gets deathly ill and wants you to devotedly be his nurse.

**Ahryin** · 01-12-2010 06:21 AM

You know good and well what is going to happen while he is away...which is why you can not go. When he says you are going to think to much that means you are going to see what is going on and start asking questions. Also just because he is honest with you doesn't mean he is honest with them about you. Being 24yrs old and him being 49 is a very huge gap. Find someone closer to your age, less stuck in their ways who will appreciate you and cherish you....not feed you lies. Saying with you its love and them its sex is a LIE. No ifs ands or buts about it.

**sourpuss** · 01-12-2010 07:30 AM

Leave him.

**KMonte85** · 01-12-2010 07:35 AM

obviously you can't trust him with this woman. You already know that he is sleeping with plenty of other women! What would make you think this young woman is any different?

If you're okay with being in an open relationship, then I guess it is not a huge deal. But if you want a boyfriend who is going to be loyal and faithful to you and ONLY you (love, sex, the whole shebang) then you need to leave him.

And also, it would be a good idea for you to get tested for STD's. If he's been out galavanting with these other women, then there is really no telling just what exactly he may have brought home to you.

**pretzel** · 01-12-2010 07:37 AM

Originally Posted by deepblue

hi, my bf and i stayed together for 9 month. he said he love me so much But i knew that he always talk to other women, As he told me it just for sex!! ... Love is just only me. He is 49 years old, he said he is going soon then now as he can do is have sex with a young women, Im 24 yrs. He always tell me that for other women just SEX.... 'Love just you and me'.... Now he going to ask one girl who he said is his student (he payed her for education for long before he know me)
He said he going to see her soon, and i asked him that i wanna go to but he said No becoz its not good for my brain, i gonna think to much, he said. Well i really want to know what gonna happen there,,, he said just talk... and he said he wont do anyth behind my back.....So how should i do or can i trust him?????

Do you believe this?

Are you sure he's not saying the same things to this other lady?

**SinisterUrge** · 01-12-2010 11:30 AM

P.T.Barnum would have something to say about this.....

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 01-30-2010 08:44 PM

I am not one to ever, worry about age.

I think that it's important to understand that people meet for reasons in life when there is a connection, there is a connection.

What I want to ask you though, is he's a teacher, or lecturer, and he paid for a girls tuition, assumingly she couldn't afford to do it. And, he still sees this girl.

Your 24, he's 49, (not judging), remember, but how did you meet him? Under what circumstances and how did he whoo you? What is it you love about him?

A man who says " he loves you but can have sex with other ladies" should not have the right to love, only have sex..

Why? Because, you are putting all of your love there to him, but he is having you and other ladies.

That is not a boyfriend.

At the end you say, he says " just talk"... Just talk, is what he is doing to you, blinding you...

Please think about you and how important you are... Not how important he is... You deserve one love to you and you to him and only that.

CW

**SixOaday** · 01-31-2010 10:01 AM

Sounds like you two have very different ideas of what should be involved in a relationship and that will never work. I personally do not believe in sexual exclusivity and all the men and women in my life know this up front. He is being direct and honest with you but you need to decide if you are really OK with this. It sounds like you are not and hoping somehow he will change. He won't if he tells you these things, you can be sure he will always be like this. If you are expecting something different from a lover than you need to leave him as soon as possible.