Thread: Boyfriend masturbating

Originally Posted by stressed

Well, what if you've openly talked about all this many times, he's said that he just watches because he wants to, without even he knowing why or having a certain preference, that he wants to do it alone and yet still isn't up for sex as much as masturbating, not matter how much you've talked about it?
Then there's nothing left to discuss and you're left there with the same mixed feelings, wondering if you should leave him because of sex or not. If it is a deeply seeded issue indeed, unsolved even after multiple open discussions, then it only has to do with the masturbator and not the partner who wants sex.

Because I deny to believe that it's me the one with the problem, because I want a healthy sexual relationship with my man, and not him who is bothered more about having more time home alone to masturbate instead of trying new things to keep him interested in bed. That situation goes beyond comprehension.

Well then, it seems like the problem is on this guy's end.

Communication is a two way street. If the woman is honestly putting herself out there, trying to meet him half way and he doesn't really respond or want to respond, then there is a problem. It may not even be solely a sexual one either, just manifesting itself that way.

To me, him "not knowing why" he does something just doesn't cut it. We're not 4 years old and shrugging things off by saying "just because I want to" doesn't fly anymore.

I wasn't trying to pick on anyone in a situation like this, especially those who are willing to talk about it with their partners. It just bugs me that there are people out there with the whole "I don't like masturbation, so my partner shouldn't do it and I shouldn't have to talk about it" attitude regardless if said partner masturbates once a month or five times a day.

I can see what you are saying stina, masturbation is just the symptom. The problem is selfishness. Women that get frustrated by this selfishness come off sounding like prudes that want to control their boyfriends every penis twitch when its far from the case.

Hi i was just wondering why my boyfriend ejaculated only like a dot after i sucked his u know what did he not like it or whats wrong is he masterbating i need answers i asked him all he said was i dont know i feel so ugly now please help

Unless it becomes a pattern I wouldn't worry about it. Some men (and women too I assume) like to have both solo and mutual sex so don't beat yourself up over it. People sometimes also like to think about having sex with someone other than their partner. Would you prefer he does that while with you or alone?