Why doesn't sex feel good?

**Jpaterson50** · 02-01-2010 02:58 PM

my girlfriend and i just started having sex and we have been for a couple weeks now. i was her first and she hadnt really done much before me. the first couple times she said it hurt then after a bit it stopped hurting but she says it just doesnt feel good. it doesnt feel bad but its not good either. its just nutral. she describes it as just being able to feel it in there. no tingeling or pleasure. just nutral. were really open with each other and i know she isnt just tring to be nice and avoiding saying im just bad in bed.

we both dont know whats going on and were wondering if it just takes a bit before it starts feeling good. like if it just starts out nutral and eventually starts being good. or if its that it just wont feel good for her. i havent been with any one that was a virgin so its all new to me as well. we are both 17 by the way.

**sourpuss** · 02-01-2010 04:30 PM

Does oral sex do anything for her?

**shweedart** · 02-01-2010 04:46 PM

I havn't been having sex long, when I first did I started a thread EXACTLY like this. I even said 'didn't feel good, didn't feel bad' it just 'felt'

It'll take a while im afraid! Her body needs to get used to it. It took me 6 months+ for it to begin to feel truly good.

I suppose its a case of firstly getting used to it, finding a rhythm, working out what feels good etc etc...

Dont rush into trying different positions either! We did, and I felt pressured to make him believe it was working for me because he was so determined for me to enjoy it.

On the 8th of Feb...I'll have been having sex for 2 years now

and its immense!

You'll get there I promise

**Mes T** · 02-01-2010 06:33 PM

I have a bit of a different view point on this, in my situation penis-in-vagina penetration almost always just feels neutral, not bad, not that exciting either.

It might be that her nerve endings are more concentrated on the outside of her vagina, particularly in the clitoral area. For me, clitoral stimulation is the only way I get off, and there's nothing wrong with that, it's just how some women (MANY women, in fact) are built.

**Jpaterson50** · 02-01-2010 07:26 PM

Originally Posted by sourpuss

Does oral sex do anything for her?

Yeah, I can make her have an orgasm through oral.
Just not through intercourse.

**Stina** · 02-01-2010 07:40 PM

I've also learned (and can testify from personal experience too) that many women simply do not have orgasms from vaginal penetration alone.

Meaning, the repetitive in-and-out isn't going to do much, unless some clitoral stimulation is involved. There are women, however, that experience g-spot or "vaginal" orgasms with no clitoral stimulation required. (Hats off to them!)

Try googling "coital alignment technique." Some variation of this is usually what works for me. This is usually best done during close contact missionary where the man can line himself up, so that while thrusting, he can make the most contact with her clitoris. She can even thrust back!

Have her get on top too, so she can set the pace and figure out what feels good for her.

**girlsex** · 02-01-2010 07:51 PM

Originally Posted by Jpaterson50

Yeah, I can make her have an orgasm through oral.
Just not through intercourse.

it's verry good.

**d4lly** · 02-01-2010 07:57 PM

when i first started having sex it felt exactly like that. not bad, but not good. it took me a few months before it felt any good. so it will probably take a while before she feels anything good. u could try making her have an orgasm through oral and then try...it mite not work for her, but it made things a bit better for me. it wouldnt hurt to try it

**Celeste** · 02-01-2010 08:36 PM

If you are only 17 and you were both virgins, then it's just going to take a little bit of time for that feeling to develope. I can distinctly remember sex not feeling bad but not feeling good either at that age, so just be patient and keep on trying new things. It will come

**Hopeless Dork** · 02-01-2010 09:02 PM

Just make sure like stina said she is getting enough clitoral stimulation during the act, different positions can make that better... or use of hands, hers or yours up top while you guys have sex.

If she orgasms through oral... she enjoys sex.. its just her vagina is more stimulated on the outside than in.... a lot of women are like that.

And a lot of women are the opposite of that and enjoy inside more than outside stimulation. Depends on the woman. And since your woman has shown outside stimulation works for her... make sure that its a focus during intercourse

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