10yrs of Frustration

**Aqemini1977** · 02-27-2010 09:27 AM

Originally Posted by WildChild

Yikes! Why 6 months? I can manage a couple of days, but months?? I'd be one difficult woman to be around.
If you were masterbating so much that is was affecting your sex, I would encourage this step but if you have a non-responsive partner what do you hope to gain?

I am actually trying to actively lower my libido by this attempt. Maybe if I go 6 months no masterbation/no porn. The only encounters I will have in theory during that 6 month period will be with my wife so in essense i have just triggered my body to get used to the once a month.

I am truly amazed. you are a woman and you masterbate. how often. I have never heard of a woman admit to masterbating. Truly eye-opening. what made you start? Do you do it for your personal enjoyment and if so why don't all women masterbate if it feels good?

**rcoreyus** · 02-27-2010 10:13 AM

The book suggestions are good in some situations. For some of us though, our SOs simply are not interested in sex. My wife wouldn't read such a book, doesn't think there is a problem that need fixing. Thinks its funny that I want sex so often (eg more than once a month or so).

Aqemini, your plan isn't that bad - basically training yourself to not want sex. I've had to work to convince myself that I'm not attracted to my wife - that I am living with my sister or something. Really sad, but what is the choice? If she doesn't want to change, I can leave, cheat, or live like a monk.

Not all women are like this, in fact I think most are not. There are some though that just don't have any interest.

**ItsASecret** · 02-27-2010 10:35 AM

I am truly amazed. you are a woman and you masterbate. how often. I have never heard of a woman admit to masterbating. Truly eye-opening. what made you start? Do you do it for your personal enjoyment and if so why don't all women masterbate if it feels good?

I would think a huge majority of women do masturbate, maybe not all get an orgasm but I am positive that at least a lot of women try. Personally I find it boring, I do it only because I am always hoping that by frequently rubbing here or there I can find some way to increase my chances of having an orgasm with my boyfriend. It has not worked, nothing gets me going in regards to masturbating but I will continue to try.

**WildChild** · 02-27-2010 10:39 AM

Originally Posted by Aqemini1977

I am actually trying to actively lower my libido by this attempt. Maybe if I go 6 months no masterbation/no porn. The only encounters I will have in theory during that 6 month period will be with my wife so in essense i have just triggered my body to get used to the once a month.

I am truly amazed. you are a woman and you masterbate. how often. I have never heard of a woman admit to masterbating. Truly eye-opening. what made you start? Do you do it for your personal enjoyment and if so why don't all women masterbate if it feels good?

Oh my, you need to do some reading here, we've had a ton of talk about masterbation and a lot of women do. I find it more a necessity than a pleasure. It's stress release and keeps me from simply going nuts without regular sex (sorry for odd spelling and such, in car on laptop, can barely read screen) If I don't cum several times a week, I'm not fit to be around.I much prefer a connected, loving relationship, but it just isn't in the cards right now.
Don't remember when I started, sometime in my teens? If I'm in good relationship I'm don't need it too often, but if not, sometimes I masterbate daily, other time a fewtimes a week - kind of depends on how busy life is, stress, general happiness levels. What I don't understand is people who never do! Ubnlessthey have an amazing partner...

**Aqemini1977** · 02-27-2010 01:55 PM

Originally Posted by WildChild

Oh my, you need to do some reading here, we've had a ton of talk about masterbation and a lot of women do. I find it more a necessity than a pleasure. It's stress release and keeps me from simply going nuts without regular sex (sorry for odd spelling and such, in car on laptop, can barely read screen) If I don't cum several times a week, I'm not fit to be around.I much prefer a connected, loving relationship, but it just isn't in the cards right now.
Don't remember when I started, sometime in my teens? If I'm in good relationship I'm don't need it too often, but if not, sometimes I masterbate daily, other time a fewtimes a week - kind of depends on how busy life is, stress, general happiness levels. What I don't understand is people who never do! Ubnlessthey have an amazing partner...

When you do masterbate, do you use any visual aids (porn/mental fantasies). I have just never met/talked to a woman who regularly masterbated. Is your masterbastion just clit based, penetration based or both.

When you are getting regular sex from SO do you hide your masterbation efforts

**WildChild** · 02-27-2010 04:25 PM

Originally Posted by Aqemini1977

When you do masterbate, do you use any visual aids (porn/mental fantasies). I have just never met/talked to a woman who regularly masterbated. Is your masterbastion just clit based, penetration based or both.

When you are getting regular sex from SO do you hide your masterbation efforts

I've never hidden it but have never had a man express any real interest in it either. My current freind-once lover, would ask if I was but really I don't know why, probably because he knows I have a high drive and he was an emotional state where he essentially refused to have sex. (kind of a knee jerk, control thing - no-one-but-me-is-going-to-decide-when-I-have-sex) He was probably figuring out why I wasn't going nuts. When there isn't anyone I'm attracted to my interest does quiet down but in his case, I want him so much, it's like an ache and to be around him can be difficult.

I'm multi orgasmic and almost always cum with intercourse but masterbating is pretty much clitoral, toys don't do much for me. I am very good at visualisation and really don't use "visual aids" other than what is in my head. I've also learned to use a tantric technique of clearing my mind and that can work very well. I prefer the real thing - provided it's with the right man.

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