Thread: Asking for Head?

My girl only gives me a bj when she has her period and not every period, id say more like once every 2 months on average. She swallows and does a pretty decent job but i kinda wish she'd do it more. It's not a big deal but I wonder if i asked for it if she'd do it more often. I dunno i always feel bad asking and feel like its wrong to ask. Is it? I mean when she doesn't have her period i think shed rather just have sex which is totally fine by me, but we don't have sex that often so would it be wrong if i asked her to blow me sometimes when she's not in the mood for sex? She insists on swallowing which i love butmaybe thats why i feel bad cuz what if it tastes horrible and she just hides it. She doesnt seem fazed by swallowing tho so maybe i shouldnt feel bad. Im not saying i want her to do it all the time but maybe a few times a month as opposed to once every 2? I would go down on her sometimes without needing reciprocation but ive offered and she doesnt want it unless its before sex to get her wet. She doesnt like head alone. So i dont know if i should ask her. A long time ago i complained a lil that she hadnt blown me in like 5 months and her response to me was that i never ask. I really dont beleive she was serious about that tho cuz ive ask a couple times since then and she blew me but she seemed a lil mad before she did it. i dunno if it was how i asked or what. It just didnt sound sincere when she said i never ask. I dunno why just intution or soemthing.

Well consider not just asking her for one, but ask her about how she feels about them. Sounds to me like you guys just need to have an open, honest discussion about what each of you like as far as giving and receiving.

Originally Posted by ocularone

Well consider not just asking her for one, but ask her about how she feels about them. Sounds to me like you guys just need to have an open, honest discussion about what each of you like as far as giving and receiving.

She always says she likes doing it for me, but wat is she gonna say she hates it? i dunno she isnt easy to talk to about this stuff. She's very easily turned off. Like god forbid i say the wrong thing during or right before sex it totally turns her off. Ive complained bout the bjs a couple times early in our relationship and each time she went on a bj rampage (for her) and blew me say 2 or 3 times in a few week period and then it went right back to normal. Id say i get one every 2-3 months on average since my bj complaints. Wat am i doing wrong? Obviosuly i made her feel really bad when i complained so she felt it was like her duty to blow me and i hated that. A blowjob doesnt feel as good when u feel like u guilted her into it. Should i just ask? How do u ask without sounding like a jerk. I would love to ask her wat she lieks i would totally do it to her, but i feel like she doesnt want anything. Its kinda depressing. She never wants me to give her head or finger her or anything unless its during sex. I sometimes feel like shes not attracted to me very much yet in love with me at the same time. She was totally not a prude when i met her she was very sexual. She seems to just not want anyting from me. Why is that? Its not like i suck, she hasnt even let me do most stuff.

Well it sounds like you guys may have some larger, more pressing issues than just the BJ one. All these questions you are directing to us are, quite honestly, good ones to ask her. I wouldn't quite word them the same way since it could come off as complaining to her. Just sit down with her one day and share your concerns. Hopefully she will see you are open to however she thinks and feels about it all. Your not out to "just get head". You are honestly concerned about her feelings about being sexually active with you. Her likes and dislikes, and so on. Don't initiate the conversation in the hopes of changing her. Just seek to understand and make sure she realizes that

Originally Posted by ocularone

Well it sounds like you guys may have some larger, more pressing issues than just the BJ one. All these questions you are directing to us are, quite honestly, good ones to ask her. I wouldn't quite word them the same way since it could come off as complaining to her. Just sit down with her one day and share your concerns. Hopefully she will see you are open to however she thinks and feels about it all. Your not out to "just get head". You are honestly concerned about her feelings about being sexually active with you. Her likes and dislikes, and so on. Don't initiate the conversation in the hopes of changing her. Just seek to understand and make sure she realizes that

I Just think the jerks get tons of sex and bjs from their gf's. Nice guys like me don't make our standards known so girls dont make an effort with us and do the bare minimum sexually. I hear of all these guys getting bjs all the time and lots of sex. I feel like a bj is a mometous occasion i can remmeebr every one shes given me cuz theyre so infrequent. i get so excited too i cum like instantaneously cuz its so rare. I wish it wasnt like that. I want it to last longer.

The is no problem asking her to do something you like. There should be no problem with her asking you to do what she likes.

You could ask for her to give you head, and at the same time ask what she would like you do do for her. Might get you talking more - which is a good thing for a relationship.

If you want more head, make her feel like she's beautiful when she does it for you. Like she excites you and turns you on... that you enjoy looking at her face while she is giving you extra special attention.

If you say ' can you blow me more'... odds are... you probably won't get blown much more.

If you tell her how awesome she makes you feel when she does it, how you can't stop thinking about how good she is ... you will get it more.

If you knew your girl got off one something you did... if it made you feel like a stud, you'd probably LOVE doing it for her.

Many girls are similiar, we want to feel beautiful and sexy and wanted... if you can make her feel that way about doing that act -- you'll get it a lot.

Originally Posted by dude123

I Just think the jerks get tons of sex and bjs from their gf's. Nice guys like me don't make our standards known so girls dont make an effort with us and do the bare minimum sexually. I hear of all these guys getting bjs all the time and lots of sex. I feel like a bj is a mometous occasion i can remmeebr every one shes given me cuz theyre so infrequent. i get so excited too i cum like instantaneously cuz its so rare. I wish it wasnt like that. I want it to last longer.

The guys that brag about it probably don't get it as often as you think. It's a trap to start making mental pictures of other people's sex lives.

If you want it to last longer tell her to do it more slowly at first, then build up the speed as she's getting ready to make you come. You have to have enough confidence to be able to ask for what you want.

And it's OK to be more aggressive with the oral on your end. Just tell her you want to try something different and see if you can bring her to orgasm that way. Tell her it's your way of learning more about her body.

And another thing. There is nothing wrong with her giving you head out of a sense of "duty". What I mean is that you can't know what it's like to be her. Relationships don't work that way. When a woman likes a guy she naturally wants to please him. Some women get pleasure (a lot of it) from sucking a guy, others are more motivated by the desire to please their man, and it's a different mix for every woman. You have to give her the space to be with you in the way that's honest for her. Unless you've tried being gay you'll never know what it's like to suck a guy's c--k, and even then it's not the same as being a woman. So stop trying to over-analyze what is going on inside other people's heads, or your own. Just be the best lover you can and tell her how much she means to you, as often as possible.

And of course, don't forget to say, "I love it when you suck my c--k", the next time she's doing it. Women really do like hearing these things.