Thread: Premature question

Originally Posted by LanaBear

Unless you've told her you are embarrassed by it, she probably has no clue or doesn't really think it is as big of a deal as you do.

More than likely you ARE satisfying her. You are pleasing her so much that they only thing she wants is for you to be inside of her. I can relate and understand completely where she is coming from.

But more than anything the two of you need to TALK and COMMUNICATE about all of this.

She knows im embarassed by it, weve talked about it. So are u saying she doesnt wanna get off from oral and or fingering? She rather me only thrust 10 times say i have to stop, and then make her go on top and still have to stop here and there or else ill come. I find it hard to believe that is pleasing her soo much. I mean hey she does have intense orgasms she screams and seems to cum alot, but its not carefree and i know she is frustrated that she always ahs to be on top. She likes it when im on top and take control, i see her facial expressions when i ask her to switch postions she kinda sighs. It kinda bothers me that she doesnt want me to please her orally. Its like im totally not necessary. its something i like to do for her, and most girls would love. WHy does she insist i stop. Im just gonna keep goin next time im fingering her and shes moaning. its ridiculous. I can make her have an intense orgasm that way, let me freaking do it. Why do i always have to be embarassed that i cant do anything for her, at least if i can do that once a week or a coupel times a month, then i have something to offer besides jsut sitting on a bed and her riding me every single time. I know shes not happy with that and thats prob why she doesnt want much sex in the first place.

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

For me, its varied... sometimes during oral or fingering or both... I am really feeling it and don't want him to stop until have an orgasm. Sometimes I am really feeling it and I just want at that moment to have more than just his finger in me so I will beckon him up for intercourse. My guy can occasionally get really excited quickly but its a turn on for me. So even if I haven't had an orgasm yet sometimes I just can't wait to feel him inside me, if he finishes before I do... he catches his breath then gives me a hand once again and its perfect.

Sex doesn't have to end with your orgasm. It really doesn't. Don't feel like you have to get all her work in before your own because when your done its all over. Instead just enjoy it, don't over think it, try to please her, let her please you and if you finish before her , realize that isn't a fail...you can always touch her afterwards if you know she wants to get hers in for the night.

No you don't know her, sex does have to end with my orgasm. She never lets me go donw on her or finger her after i orgasm. I insist and she flat out says no. Its so frustrating im already embarassed cuz i came so quick and she wont even let me try and make it better by pleasurign her. Wat is that? its ridiculous. She wants nothing from me it makes me feel like garbage. i soemtimes wonder if she ever wants sex at all. Im almost always the initiator and we hardly do it. Maybe im too nice and let her dominate everything. She acts like she is in charge. I cant do anything i want in bed and i dont ask for much believe me, shes so boring with sex im getting fed up.

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

You say that she controls what you do... but you say you ask her to get on top and she sighs... so you are directing her to get on top that doesn't sound like she has all the control in the bed.

No thats different she usually offers to get on top cuz she knows thats the only way i can make her come. Thats a big difference.

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

and yeah, a sad but true fact... that just as many women have hurt from as men have is that the one with a lower drive, the one with less interest in sex controls the sex. Its the way it is.

If you love her outside of the bedroom its worth working through... but if you guys have problems in other areas this sexual imcompatibility may be a problem.

It sounds like to me that she doesn't have a problem with your premature ejaculations, you do. She's willing to be content with your sex life not being able to have orgasms with you inside her and your frustrated and feel like giving up because she's boring in bed? Do you realize that sounds kind of one-sided and not very fair.

No i dont see what ur saying at all. I feel bad about being a minute man, thats why i wanna be able to go down on her and finger her till she cums. Im saying that im frustrated that she wont ever let me. First of all she does almost always come when shes on top. She is not ok with my prem ejac cuz she never ever wants sex. Even tho she comes on top, it obviosuly isnt good for her cuz she never initiates or hardly ever. She doesnt let me please her in other ways so how r u making me into a selfish person here? i wanna do wat i can to plkease her and she wotn let me. Just for the record she blowes me once every 3 or 4 months and she knows i love it, i nevert ask for it but ive told her i love it. i asked for it once and she was upset so i never did again and i asked nicely. So here she does nothign for me sexually, she doesnt blow me, refuses to give me a hand job, deosnt let me come on her, doesnt let me have anythign my way ever, its her way or the hgihway and yet im the bad one to you. I give up with this board. Women r always right. men r always wrong. i forgot