Thread: Age of Consent

Legally I'd like it to be 16, with age gap rules (eg, 15 and 17 is legal). Doesn't mean I think it is a good idea, but shouldn't be criminal .

When I was 13 when I had sex with a guy I consented to , fully thinking it was what I wanted, he was over 18 and pretty much just used me. But to me, I thought I loved him, I thought it was what I wanted.

During my teenage years I had sex with many guys, just to try to feel their affection. To have someone think I was worth anything even if for just the few minutes they were on top of me.

I realize later I had no business consenting to all that. I was ignorant, insecure, needy and taken advantage of by men that were much older and knew better.

I think a guy over 18 years old has no business having sex with a girl under 16. If you are legally adult in your jurisdiction, you have no business accepting the consent of someone legally a minor in your jurisdiction.

Do I think a 17 year old guy should go to jail for having sex with his 16 year old girlfriend? No. Do I think a 17 year old guy should go to jail for having sex with his 14 year old girlfriend? Yes.

Oh it is indeed a slippery slope, but when people start blurring the age lines down, just how far can they go?

Look at the popularity of barely legal teen porn. The fresher the 18 year old the better. They want them on their BIRTHDAY where they were 17 just minutes before. While that porn may not be pedo in nature... its basically saying... if we could look at younger girls legally, we would... but we'll look at the absolute youngest thing we legally can... and have her dressed and behaving even younger than she is.

Girls go from barbies to make up and boys in one summer. And that summer is different for everyone... and they should come out of the barbies of their own free will... with boys at their same mental capacity and age where the playing fields are leveled.

At 25 I knew a heck of a lot more about myself and life than I did at 21... and at 21 I barely recognized the girl I thought I was at 18... and that girl was a whole lot wiser than the 15 year old version of myself. And so on.

When you are talking about teenagers every year counts when it comes to maturity, responsability and understanding. An 18 year old has leaps and bounds on a 14 year old and I think a law in place protecting one from the other is valid. Even if the 14 year old feels like she knows whats best for her and even if the 18 year old guy thinks his 14 year old gf is wise beyond her years *eyeroll*

Originally Posted by Hopeless Dork

When you are talking about teenagers every year counts when it comes to maturity, responsability and understanding. An 18 year old has leaps and bounds on a 14 year old and I think a law in place protecting one from the other is valid. Even if the 14 year old feels like she knows whats best for her and even if the 18 year old guy thinks his 14 year old gf is wise beyond her years *eyeroll*

Well 13 is too young, and personally I think 14 is also, but it's the age my gf lost her v-card and she has always said she never had any regrets.

And by no means should any young girl be used by a guy for sex (and vice versa) but legal or not it's going to happen if they really think the guy loves them. And honestly my girlfriend says she is glad she experienced a guy who was a player. Not because of the way he used her, but because it made her realize that she needs to be more careful and set her standards.

And it is a valid point. If you never hook up with a d-bag in your last years in school, you won't be nearly as appreciative as a guy like me who is the polar opposite.

I guess it's the rainy day/sunny day scenario. And at leastas my opinion, there is a difference between being preyed on and being used.

I really don't think it's necessary to "hook up with a d-bag," much less while in high school, to appreciate someone of worth.
A lesson can be learned at any age - and isn't it better that someone be mentally capable of submitting to and understanding the lesson?
That's almost like saying that a child will learn not to cohabit with someone who is an abuser because daddy beat him. Children - which 15-year-olds are - are not equipped to make a deduction like that. In fact, most adults aren't.
16 sounds more or less reasonable, only because of the laws that allow a 16-year-old to work for at least minimum wage. A 16-year-old can be independent, can provide his or her own form of contraceptive, can provide his or her own form of medical care in the case of an STI or pregnancy, and could support any child that his/her sexual activity created. If labor laws changed, my opinion probably would too.
In the UK, I believe the age of sexual consent IS 16.
But in the US, your life changes drastically at or around the age of 18 - you leave the state-mandated school system, whether by graduating or quitting, and you become the arbiter of your own destiny - whether to continue your education, stay in your parents' home, work full-time, do all of the above or none. That's why it's so out-of-sorts for someone aged 18 or older to be interested in someone 16 or younger. Their lives SHOULD be immensely different. Every person I've known (from the US) over the age of 18 who has pursued a relationship with a minor has been mentally underdeveloped in some way.
The parasitic relationships between those mentally underdeveloped "adults" and minors will certainly happen regardless of legality, but it's very important to discourage them, for the safety of those minors - children - who are still developing their ideas about how the world does and should work.

Well first of all I dont think there should ever be a relationship between one person who is in high school and one who isn't. At least at my school, there were plenty of seniors who were 19 before they graduated, and it wasnt because they all failed or anything.

The reason I say 15 is because that's the normal age of freshman. Maybe keeping the 9th grade as a middle school and having only 10,11,12 would also be a good solution. But I don't think it's wrong or out of the ordinary for a freshman to date a senior.

Also, at least in America, you can work when you are 15 (usually for minimum wage, though), you just aren't allowed to work overtime.

And legally it is possible, but how many 16 year olds have you ever known that were fully independent.

I guess what I am saying is if they are both in High School and both teenagers, one shouldn't be going to jail.

I knew a guy who was 17 and after 1 year his girlfriend wanted them to do it. So they did, and ended up getting caught. The girl's mom pressed charges and he went to jail for 2 1/2 years for statutory rape. After he got it out, it was easy to see jail really (edit) him up. He was genuinely the nicest guy I knew. When he got out of jail he was covered in tattoos and told me while he was in his inmate tried to kill him, so after the third time he was almost killed by his roommate, he bashed the guys head against the wall and accidentally killed him. I mean, it's sending people to an environment they dont belong in for something consensual.

And I can see what you mean little. No, I don't think every girl should be used by a guy. But I do think it should happen because it does teach a lesson to everybody, not just the two teens involved. I'm sure we all know people who have unrealistic expectations of how their SO should be. And even if they are 9 out of 10 things on the list are checked off, they throw them to the curb because they aren't perfect. And I think it's because they don't realize how many horrible potential mates are out there (Don't get me wrong, there are definitely plenty of good men and women out there, but there are even more bad ones). I just think that until somebody has never experienced a rainy day, they won't fully appreciate a sunny day and will never be satisfied enough for a good catch.


Oh well, that's me and my gf's rant. She was telling me a few things to type. I guess I just have a big issue that anybody still in high school can go to jail for something like this. A fine maybe, or a confiscated driver's license. Even community service. But jail?